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I’m going to a model horse show this Sat. I have an AMAZING friend with 6 children who is going to watch my daughter Chloe. I’ll only be an hour away, with a cell phone, and an emergany number, and 4 wheel drive so I can probably make the one hour trip in 10 min. if needed. Michele(the sitter) gets along really well with Chloe(who’s almost 11 months).
This is the second time EVEr i’ve been away from chloe. The first time i had an MRI, and she stayed with Michelle. I had a panic attack, almost wrecked the car, my hands where shaking, Michele said I looked like I was gonna pass out. Chloe was fine, and had fun. 6 kids aparently are quite amusing when you’re small.
So, does any other parent have this kind of seperation anxiety? Michelle kinda giggles, and she knows how I am, so she gives me a warm pat on the back, then tells me not to worry. But, i’m kinda nuts with Chloe. I don’t let strangers stick thier dirty fingers all over her. I don’t let anyone but previous parents hold her. That came from watching other people let thier children hold babies then dropping them, and my sister’s son actualy got ahold of Chloe over Christmas and dropped her right on her head.
Anyway. So, how do folks deal with this kind of anxiety? I plan to take my laptop, wonder if I’m a buyer when I get anxious? 😯 (says to hubby) But hunny, I was SOOO worked up about Chloe, I just HAD to buy those 5 Windstone dragons. And they were SUCH A DEAL. 😯
Anyway, thanks for reading. It’s Thrus. i’m leaving Sat. And I can feel it already.
Awwwww…Im sorry. I wish I knew how to help, but I have been leaving Justin for months at a time since he was a baby. I wish you the best and I hope you manage the trip without stressing too much 🙂
skigod377 wrote:Awwwww…Im sorry. I wish I knew how to help, but I have been leaving Justin for months at a time since he was a baby. I wish you the best and I hope you manage the trip without stressing too much 🙂
Thanks!
She was supposed to stay home here with daddy, but he just got back froma buisness trip, and is really behind on hi school work, so I figured I’d do us all a favor and let Michelle watch her(plus, daddy’s never been alone with Chloe before).Well I can sort of answer you question because I was a mom at one time. My ex-fiance had a daughter and she was really young as well. I wouldn’t trust her own father to take care of her. He would get really frusterated at her when she got into something and I would have to take her out of the situation because if I didn’t he would of hit her or choked her like this one time. Everywhere I went, I took her with me. When her father and I broke up it was really hard not to try to be in her life, but eventually I phased out. I know it is hard to leave the children behind because as a parent you want to stick around and protect them. But also remember that you have to let other people take care of them as well. You have to take time for yourself to be by yourself. If you trust Michelle, then it your daughter should be fine. Maybe when you have a break at your convention then you can call Michelle and check in.
Also, remember that the father needs the experience and needs the time to spend with his daughter as well. My sister is in the same position. Her husband works all the time and is on business trips all the time. His work comes before family. She doesn’t trust him to take care of my nephew so she is stuck taking care of him all the time. She rarely gets time to herself unless she has to go to school or works out.
Anyway, I hope some of this helps. 🙂
dragonessjade wrote:Well I can sort of answer you question because I was a mom at one time. My ex-fiance had a daughter and she was really young as well. I wouldn’t trust her own father to take care of her. He would get really frusterated at her when she got into something and I would have to take her out of the situation because if I didn’t he would of hit her or choked her like this one time. Everywhere I went, I took her with me. When her father and I broke up it was really hard not to try to be in her life, but eventually I phased out. I know it is hard to leave the children behind because as a parent you want to stick around and protect them. But also remember that you have to let other people take care of them as well. You have to take time for yourself to be by yourself. If you trust Michelle, then it your daughter should be fine. Maybe when you have a break at your convention then you can call Michelle and check in.
Also, remember that the father needs the experience and needs the time to spend with his daughter as well. My sister is in the same position. Her husband works all the time and is on business trips all the time. His work comes before family. She doesn’t trust him to take care of my nephew so she is stuck taking care of him all the time. She rarely gets time to herself unless she has to go to school or works out.
Anyway, I hope some of this helps. 🙂
Hey,
Yes, it did help. Makes me feel a little less crazy 😯I have no doubt that Michelle is very safe, she’s a great friend, and with 6 of her own, she’s got plenty of poopy diaper experience 😆 She loves kids, and Chloe always has fun when she’s over there. It’s just all those WHAT IF’s.
Eek. I think I might have called CYS over that fellow when you broke up. Chris (my hubby) does get frustrated when she gets into all of his stuff, but I don’t think for a second that he would do anything to hurt her. Which is good. I just keep explaining to him that she’s small, and eyelevel things cause a lot of curiosity, be it a controler, pile of bills, computer, dog bone, whatever. Her favorite thing, wel, one of them, is to throw packing peanuts out of the box and toss them all over the floor, one by one. drives hubby nuts, but really, there’s so many far more annoying things she could be doing, like screaming.
I already forwarned michelle, and the host of the hsow, that I’ll be making several breaks to call. It’s werid, I don’t really consider Chloe a burden at all, but sometimes when she goes to bed, and chris is here to watch the house, I take the dog out ofr a walk, and I come back feeling like a whole new person.
I’ve never had that kind of anxiety; I only took a 3-months mat leave. But your little one’s going to go to school one day! You have to remember that no matter how much you fear for her, she’ll be fine with Michelle, and with her future teachers…
And I agree. I’m kind of shocked that at 11 months, she’s never been alone with daddy. I think it’s best for the both of you to each have time alone with your daughter and time alone-alone!
Go to your show and concentrate only on that. Michelle will be fine with Chloe – and Chloe will have a blast with the other kids!
I remember when Chinook (my daughter) was 1 year and a half. We went to this barbecue where we hardly knew anybody. As soon as we stepped into the house, she spotted the kids there and we didn’t see her again until it was time to go home. I think she had a better time than we did! And right now, she 8 and she just landed in France where she’ll spend the next 3 weeks with her grand-parents! It’s quality time all around for the whole familly.
Remember that you’re not alone in raising your child, and that you need to have your own life too. Have fun!
Read my books! Volume 1 and 2 of A Dragon Medley are available now.
http://www.sarahjestin.com/mybooks.htm
I host the feedback lists, which are maintained by drag0nfeathers.
http://www.sarahjestin.com/feedbacklists.htmbluepony78 wrote:dragonessjade wrote:Well I can sort of answer you question because I was a mom at one time. My ex-fiance had a daughter and she was really young as well. I wouldn’t trust her own father to take care of her. He would get really frusterated at her when she got into something and I would have to take her out of the situation because if I didn’t he would of hit her or choked her like this one time. Everywhere I went, I took her with me. When her father and I broke up it was really hard not to try to be in her life, but eventually I phased out. I know it is hard to leave the children behind because as a parent you want to stick around and protect them. But also remember that you have to let other people take care of them as well. You have to take time for yourself to be by yourself. If you trust Michelle, then it your daughter should be fine. Maybe when you have a break at your convention then you can call Michelle and check in.
Also, remember that the father needs the experience and needs the time to spend with his daughter as well. My sister is in the same position. Her husband works all the time and is on business trips all the time. His work comes before family. She doesn’t trust him to take care of my nephew so she is stuck taking care of him all the time. She rarely gets time to herself unless she has to go to school or works out.
Anyway, I hope some of this helps. 🙂
Hey,
Yes, it did help. Makes me feel a little less crazy 😯I have no doubt that Michelle is very safe, she’s a great friend, and with 6 of her own, she’s got plenty of poopy diaper experience 😆 She loves kids, and Chloe always has fun when she’s over there. It’s just all those WHAT IF’s.
Eek. I think I might have called CYS over that fellow when you broke up. Chris (my hubby) does get frustrated when she gets into all of his stuff, but I don’t think for a second that he would do anything to hurt her. Which is good. I just keep explaining to him that she’s small, and eyelevel things cause a lot of curiosity, be it a controler, pile of bills, computer, dog bone, whatever. Her favorite thing, wel, one of them, is to throw packing peanuts out of the box and toss them all over the floor, one by one. drives hubby nuts, but really, there’s so many far more annoying things she could be doing, like screaming.
I already forwarned michelle, and the host of the hsow, that I’ll be making several breaks to call. It’s werid, I don’t really consider Chloe a burden at all, but sometimes when she goes to bed, and chris is here to watch the house, I take the dog out ofr a walk, and I come back feeling like a whole new person.
That is good. If you don’t have any doubt about Michelle then everything should be fine. I wouldn’t try to worry about anything until it happens. Toddlers are at the learning stage, they are curious about everything. I totally love it when they are this old. I would rather have a toddler than a baby. It is good that at least you get little breaks to refresh yourself. Even if the child isn’t a burden, you still need that because there might of been stuff overlooked.I was thinking about calling Child Protective Services on my ex, but I was friends with his ex-gf (baby’s mother) at the time I broke up with him so I knew their daughter was in better hands and I didn’t want the mother to loose her daughter because of my ex.
dragonmedley wrote:I’ve never had that kind of anxiety; I only took a 3-months mat leave. But your little one’s going to go to school one day! You have to remember that no matter how much you fear for her, she’ll be fine with Michelle, and with her future teachers…
And I agree. I’m kind of shocked that at 11 months, she’s never been alone with daddy. I think it’s best for the both of you to each have time alone with your daughter and time alone-alone!
Go to your show and concentrate only on that. Michelle will be fine with Chloe – and Chloe will have a blast with the other kids!
I remember when Chinook (my daughter) was 1 year and a half. We went to this barbecue where we hardly knew anybody. As soon as we stepped into the house, she spotted the kids there and we didn’t see her again until it was time to go home. I think she had a better time than we did! And right now, she 8 and she just landed in France where she’ll spend the next 3 weeks with her grand-parents! It’s quality time all around for the whole familly.
Remember that you’re not alone in raising your child, and that you need to have your own life too. Have fun!
don’t get me wrong, Chris loves her and does play with her, but I think he’s afraid to be alone with her! At any rate, he told me he’s going to watch her “as long as he can” THEN take her to Michelle’s. I was surprised. But, he’s really supportive about me going to shows, he always has been, and he kinda likes that now someone stays home with Chloe, so he doesn’t have to go with me anymore haha.
I’m actually a stay at home mom. I run a buisness that was faily small until just recently, now suddenly it seems to be triple what it was a few months ago. But, I do know I need to have someone else watch Chloe every once in a while. I have a great life, and she cracks me up, but she’s got a lot of stranger anxiety’s now that I’d like to see broken. I’m no horibly social, (in person, on the computer I never shut up) but I’d like her to be a litle better adjusted 😆
It’s so hard to find the right balance! On one hand, being at home with her is great for personal development and the relationship. On the other hand, they get scared of strangers. But when you work full time, you might get the impression you don’t spend enough time with them.
My husband and I found ours with our daughter, but it took a little while. I’m sure you’ll do fine.
Read my books! Volume 1 and 2 of A Dragon Medley are available now.
http://www.sarahjestin.com/mybooks.htm
I host the feedback lists, which are maintained by drag0nfeathers.
http://www.sarahjestin.com/feedbacklists.htmYou guys are so great 😀 I wasn’t expecting so many people to chime in. Donno why, this is a pretty talkative group 😀
You know, when Chloe was a baby I was so sure there was nothing better in the world that an iddy biddy baby. Now that she’s becoming a small person though, gosh, I’m not sure there’s anthing more fun. A LOT more work. And a lot shorter afternoon nap 😆 , but oh man, she’s just too cool. She’s into everything. She’s SO curious. She loves shopping, playing, being read to, and she even helps me clean (you know, in toddler make a huge mess kinda way). And she smiles at me, talks, it’s just so funny.
Wonder if when she’s a teen, I’ll think GOSH, there’s just nothing better than teen years. I hope so.
Although, I feel old now. I’m a “mrs. fry” to all of the kids aroud here. They sell me girlscout cookies, and treat me like I’m an adult or something. It’s weird. I’m 26, but I guess I never really thought of myself as a REAL adult til Chloe came along. 😯
Well there are times when people don’t say much and you have to ask them again. hehe
Yep, toddlers are great. I haven’t heard of teenagers being great tho. Hopefully your daughter will be a 1st. It is so cute when they try and help you. Let us know how it goes.
I found out when I was a adult when I had bills to pay. hehe
You know, you need to get that time by yourself. It may not feel like it, but it’s healthy for both you and your daughter! At first, it’s really hard to leave them, especially your first. It gets easier over time, but you never stop worrying about What ifs. Take heart, it sounds like Michelle is an ‘old hand’ at taking care of kids!! After 6 kids, there probably isn’t much she hasn’t seen! And if she stays with Daddy, even better! I can’t tell you how many times I have come home to find my hubby sleeping on the couch with our 2 kids and atleast one cat! The house is never clean, the kids always need a bath and no laundry gets done, but they all had fun together.
Let us know how it goes!!
asinnamon wrote:I can’t tell you how many times I have come home to find my hubby sleeping on the couch with our 2 kids and atleast one cat! The house is never clean, the kids always need a bath and no laundry gets done, but they all had fun together.
Let us know how it goes!!
awe. that would be cute 😀
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