Ready to have kids?

[wolflodge100]

whippetluv wrote:

Way late…but my sob story
*pulls out tiny violin*
My partner of 8 years and I have been tring for a child for 3 years. We have tried frozen at home…frozen in a docs. office using interuterian *spelling?*, fresh from a friend…everything.
Months and months of being hopeful. Are her boobs darker? Is she feeling bloated? Could it be? And then the dissapointment of yet another faliure. The weeks afterwards of crying when diaper commercials came on. Then I tried….still nothing.
We are at a cross roads now…The only steps left are Invetro (10 to 15 grand for a CHANCE) or Adoption (28 grand). We would have to adopt a forgein child so that adds to the expense. Only a few countrys will adopt to a single woman or a lesbian couple.
We have had not ONE but TWO pregnat mothers offer us their children and then change their mind 6/7 months into the pregnacy.
I have decorated or bought decorations for a nusury twice.
My heart can’t take much more.
*someone hand me a tissue*

hands whippet a tissue. Gives hug. It’s really a shame when someone who really WANTS a child can’t have one and so many people that don’t care have them for all the wrong reasons

[Pamela]

I am so sorry Whippet *sends hugs*

My sister is gay and she and her wife (they live in Boston) adopted a little girl 4 years ago. They went through all the options and did find that the regulations for adopting foreign children had been changed so they didn’t have a chance. Except maybe Russia but 2 of their friends had adopted Russian kids who have pretty bad bonding issues. So they ended up adopting through Boston’s CPS. It took awhile but they ended up with a 10 month old little girl – my niece Emily who just turned 5 last week. They are in the process of trying to adopt a second child.

But I know that adoption is much different state to state. So what MA allows another state might not.

Good luck. I hope if you decide to try in vitro it works. But if you decide to adopt I can tell you that no one in our family loves Emily any less because she is adopted. I forget sometimes in spite of the situation because she is soooo much like my sister. I once said “like Mother, like daughter” not even thinking about it. Emily has brought a lot of joy to our lives.

[DigitalDragon]

Sorry to hear that, whippet. I have friends who are a lesbian couple who also wanted to adopt a little girl from China. I think they might have decided against it for the difficulties you suggest that might present. They’re going to try for their own soon (in vitro most likely, or artifical insemination… all I can say is I am looking forward to having a kid who’s not my own that I can spoil *grin*). The one who’s going to carry it has had Hodgkins and radiation treatment in the past, so hopefully she’s still intact and fertile in there… I hope she doesn’t suffer the same unfortunate dilemma you’ve experienced.

I wish you and your partner the best of luck.

[Bob]

I wish you teh best of luck on getting a child in some way. There are many out there that need a family and love

[Author]

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