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Just wanted to concur on the posts putting forth the opinion that this doesn’t seem to be a new phenomenon. When I first discovered the forum about a year ago, I devoured some of the threads and while the overall tenor was always light and friendly there would be occasional valleys when comments would be made and there would be a few posts feeding the snark. But, then it would all blow over. And one thing I have definitely noticed. Often the same people who had a dust-up would seem to go out of their way to compliment the other person over a new acquisition or post. I think for the most part, people try to mend fences and play nice – but sometimes our baser nature takes over briefly. (the underlying issue that brought all this to a head is another animal entirely, but it is also such an extreme outlier that it really just isn’t pertinent to this discussion IMO)
I really don’t think the forum is in serious danger – 95% (or higher) of us just want to come on and ooh and ahhh with others who actually understand. We just need to clarify courses of action on those rare occasions when something does go wrong. Sending feedback to dragonmedley (thank you, thank you) is very important, as is consulting the feedback when contemplating a trade/buy with someone you’ve not dealt with. There are great suggestions in the “Classified Rules” thread. If we all – as much as possible – agree to send $ only as “payment for goods/services” and use invoices – with that higher degree of accountability and protection – I would think much of these problems would disappear. And they are SO rare as it is – which speaks volumes about the high caliber of most of those here. 🙂My computer has been in the repair shop for 15 days, so I’ve been on and off here through my phone. And seeing all thi kind of petty drama just realy
really saddenIme. I joined a year and a half ago I believe, and since its been nothing but positive experiences. See, December 2014, my father abandoned the family. March 2015, my mother was diagnosed with cancer. For five straight months, I was in the hospital every day with her, taking care of her, helping her eat and holding her while she cried. All the while suffering a severe clinical depression. I couldn’t stand being on Facebook because everyone either ignored me or fought with each other. So I came here.Waiting for my mother’s daily radiation to end or sitting beside her in chemotherapy, I loved reading about everyone and the going ons. And here, I was comforted and reassured everything would be okay. I loved seeing people win grail pieces or get thier favorite grab bag. It really helped me see the good still left in people, and inspired me not to give up my art forever. So to see all this unhappiness and fighting is just not right. I still believe we’re a community sharing a love of something beautiful. Perhaps we should all take a collective breath
, and those in the center of this, step back and think if its worth it to ruin someone’s day over material things (gorgeous as they all are) and petty fights. I know drama will never end, but let’s perhaps keep this a warm, welcoming community. Most, if not all I’ve interacted with are kind and lovely. Let’s keep it as such (I’m sorry this is so long. Its just you guys have no idea how you’ve helped me. And sorry for any spelling errors, I typed yhis on my phone and I’ve got big fingers ha ha)Finding happiness again.
Perhaps we should all take a collective breath, and those in the center of this, step back and think if its worth it to ruin someone’s day over material things (gorgeous as they all are) and petty fights. I know drama will never end, but let’s perhaps keep this a warm, welcoming community. Most, if not all I’ve interacted with are kind and lovely. Let’s keep it as such (I’m sorry this is so long. Its just you guys have no idea how you’ve helped me. And sorry for any spelling errors, I typed yhis on my phone and I’ve got big fingers ha ha)
Lots of hugs, Celestial Rainstorm! <3 Well said and I'm so glad this forum was a refuge for you in such hard times.
I’ve been here for a long time. I decided to join because I emailed Mel and she told me about the forum. Over the years I’ve done raffles and contests? and helped people out moneywise (thru here) who deserved help and organized many ” Here’s a present from the forum, hope it makes you feel better ” things.
That being said, I myself have not commented here as much as I used to because the dynamic has changed. Everyone has troubles, I myself come here to THIS forum for my help and support.
Our older members did have our problems, but it never escalated into outright war. I personally want the old forum back. I miss the way it used to be.I want to comment rather in tune with Celestial Rainstorm. I’ve been around for a while too, and I’ve seen bouts of nastiness before. And while I can understand John and others wanting to give up on this Forum, I really hope you don’t.
This place was such an immense blessing in my life during my major depression in 2007. The energy, enthusiasm, delight, kindness–they were such a bright spot in my days and definitely one of things that helped me make it through. So I want our wonderful hosts and moderators to remember there are those of us who have had our lives enriched by this place, though like all places it won’t ever be perfect. That’s one reason I’ve been doing birthday posts for a while–an attempt to ‘pay it forward’ and give back to a place that has brightened my life, and because I don’t want the great people who participate here to ever feel forgotten (if they share their birth date, of course!)
Whichever choice you make, just let me THANK YOU for sharing so much with us, and going so far beyond what anyone can ever expect of a ‘company.’ Thank you so much!
🙂 I’d miss the forum if it went. Seeing all the positive interactions and support of one another is what finally encouraged me to stop being a lurker. It’s nice to know that this place has helped others so much emotionally. What we can do to help out is just each of us try to put our best foot forward now.
You can check out my work on dA & Redbubble!
https://prezaurian.deviantart.com/
https://www.redbubble.com/people/prezaurian?ref=artist_title_nameInteresting – I did not read John’s message as possibly closing down the Forum. I took it as maybe eliminating the Classifieds, which also would be unfortunate and probably lead to more problems rather than fewer. However, they would not be on Windstone’s doorstep.
Regarding Forum posts that seem to be – or are – forum inappropriate:
Perhaps policing ourselves may potentially work if when someone replies to one of these inappropriate threads, it is with a comment on the offending thread such as “I Feel This Topic is Inappropriate for the Forum, Please Take This to PM’s” AND at this point, OTHERS respect this point of view and don’t perpetuate the thread by adding any follow up comments of their own, other than agreeing that future comments should be through PM’s. Perhaps just dropping responses to these offensive or aggressive threads may work. Although I still believe that if the offending threads can be deleted completely so that they don’t continue to ‘hang around’ as a reminder, that would be best.This suggestion will only work if people ‘police’ themselves and their impulses. And of course the best thing would be to really think before posting a thread or comments to an existing one – as was mentioned earlier. Comments posted online on any website or venue Do ‘live’ forever on the Net in most cases (and are searchable). And is it truly worth it to foster bad feelings and potentially poison future friendships?
IN SEARCH OF MY NEXT GRAILS:
Black Peacock & Butternut Adult Poads
Kickstarter 'Rainbow Tiger' Bantam Dragon*~*~*~* Ela_Hara: The DragonKeeper *~*~*~*
*** Come visit me on deviantArt at http://ela-hara.deviantart.comThe only reason there have been a few threads recently about problems with people is because of a lack of communication on the part of the people the threads are about or posted by. The ones about trading issues, not receiving trades and the one about the chargebacks that a few people got were posted because the people they were about stopped all communication and wouldn’t send or reply to pms and several people were affected. I lost $100 with the chargeback issue which still hasn’t been resolved when that person promised to write us back and refund us our money and hasn’t been on here since. The most recent thread that was posted where she said she wanted pms has not sent nor replied to any pms either so this is what aggravates already sensitive situations when these people stop communicating privately and then post public threads telling people to pm them to which they never respond. In some cases I think it might in fact be good to leave up threads warning people about problems they could have with others. But I also think some that have been posted have been completely unnecessary and that the people saying they want pms should pm people instead of posting new threads to deliberately perpetuate drama and upset people. I am upset myself that I had the unfortunate luck of having dealt with 3 people that weren’t honest about trades and sales. Now on the other hand I have dealt with maybe 20 people that were all honest about trades and sales and many have become great friends so it is unfortunate that the bad experiences have just recently overshadowed the good ones. I do appreciate the great conversations I have had on here with others and how some people have been so helpful and sweet. It would be nice to get back to that again and put everything else behind us if these issues could all be resolved with communication instead of perpetrated by a lack of it.
Looking for rainbow or pink & teal grab bags!
Honestly, I don’t think any discussions about trade/sale issues should be happening on the forum at all. If you can’t resolve the issue via PMs, then contact a moderator.
If it’s a case where you’re not actually out anything (i.e. you haven’t sent money and not gotten a piece or you haven’t sent a trade and not gotten your piece in return), then just let it go.
It stinks when a sale or a trade falls through, but no one owes anyone a trade or a sale in either direction. If a piece is theirs, it’s theirs to do with what they please. Leave feedback on the list if appropriate, but then move on. If you have a bad experience, don’t deal with that person again.
Kim does make a very good point in that most of the threads posted publicly were because the affected parties were not getting responses via PM. I, personally, did not realize I could contact a moderator if, for example, I did not receive a trade item and was not getting any response via PM. So I can understand someone thinking that their only recourse in that case would be to post publicly. I’m sure the information about contacting a moderator is in the rules but I honestly was not aware of it. So, good information to have! Thank you!
Just a quick note, our “suggested” order of things is this: If you have a sale/trade that goes south, we always, ALWAYS want you to work it out in private and not bring it to the public forum. Email, PM, whatever you prefer. Try to work it out in private. If necessary, use Paypal to file a claim. Moderators can’t directly police or be a go-between for transactions, for a number of reasons.
If you can’t get anywhere with that, or can’t file a Paypal claim (etc), then you can come to one of us or John with evidence of a scam or ripoff. John is the final deciding factor in if action will be taken against a user, such as banning or asking them not to use the classifieds, etc. We, the mods, really can’t mediate a transaction, but we will try to help as none of us mods or staff at the factory wants people to use the Windstone site as a way to scam others.
I’ll make a list with who the mods are.
Maybe Pam can have a link to the forum rules show up when people resister an account?
Volunteer mod- I'm here to help! Email me for the best response: nambroth at gmail.com
My art: featherdust.comI have updated the rules (or, replied to them) with the list of mods and generally what those mods do.
http://windstoneeditions.com/forum/windstone-forum-rules-guidelines
Volunteer mod- I'm here to help! Email me for the best response: nambroth at gmail.com
My art: featherdust.com
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