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Rod is trying to portray me as an unfit parent… *AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*
twindragonsmum
All the judge need to do is speak to your boys to get the correct picture. Your boys know what kind of Mom you are and they are old enough to speak for themselves and speak the truth. BE strong!! Do not let him and his assinine behaviour bring you down!!
Rod is trying to portray me as an unfit parent… *AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*
twindragonsmum
Unfortunately, this is what some guys do–it happened to a friend of mine years back when her husband divorced her. What has been said is right–judges seen and heard it all. They see through the crap and if your boyohs were asked their opinion, which they might since they’re old enough, a whole different picture will be painted. Instead of being concerned about the welfare of your boys, he seems to be more intent of trashing you. WTF??!! You have us here supporting you and sending positive thoughts. This too will end.
Blerg. Seriously. My mom and stepdad divorced and he made it as difficult as humanly possible for her.
He felt he was entitled to such-and-such Enourmous Amount of Money. He was legally only entitled to Extremely Modest Amount of Money. My mom offered him MORE than what was required as a settlement. He refused. She increased the offer several more times; he kept refusing and insisted on dragging her to court, which took 2 years.
EVERYONE except his young, inexperienced attorney told him to TAKE THE SETTLEMENT AND GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE.
But no, he was going to take my mom to court and get all of his demands.
So to court they went. And the judge laughed in his face, and he got what he was legally entitled to and not a penny more.
Judges seem pretty smart.
Ever had one of the days where you screw one thing up, and then everything else follows? I’m screaming right now about last night/this morning!
I forgot my father’s b-day for the 1st time in 30 years. Now I have covered my siblings butts and reminded them about b-days their entire lives, and so has my mother. But did anyone call me? Nope…because I “would never forget something like that.” So my mothers wait three days to call me, and then it’s to ask if I’m still alive, since I never would have forgotten otherwise. (aside the fact that I’m working full-time, with a 3 year old, etc.) But excuses aside, I should not have forgotten. So I felt horrible, and decided to make him cookies and overnight them to him. I had enought time to make the batter, and stick in the fridge before going to appt I couldn;t miss, figuring I could finish them after the appt. However, when i get home, I smell cookies. My lovely, dear husband had decided to finish them for me, so I wouldn;t have to stay up late. Problem is, he overcooked them all. So I swallow my frustration, and thank him for the help, and can;t sleep all night thinking about should I send my father the overcooked cookies (which he won;t like, since he is very particular), for his already missed birthday, or should I remake them, but upset my husband, who really was trying to help?
And this morning, i decide to remake them, but now hubby is upset that he “ruined” the other ones. So either way I’m a bad guy. Screaming now…Keeper of the Fledgings
Awwwww! At least he was trying to help! You’re not a bad guy for wanting your dad to have perfect cookies, maybe hubby is a little upset too that his happy plan to help you backfired. Would it help his bruised ego if you gave him a kiss and told him that you appreciate the thought? That was a sweet thing for him to think to do for you even if it turned out a bit of a mess. 🙂
Ah, I talked to hubby at lunch. He said he was just upset they didn’t come out right, and when I come home and make the new batch, could he please watch so he can learn to do them right in case this happens again? Okay…so…deep breath, and sigh, now.
Keeper of the Fledgings
Ah, I talked to hubby at lunch. He said he was just upset they didn’t come out right, and when I come home and make the new batch, could he please watch so he can learn to do them right in case this happens again? Okay…so…deep breath, and sigh, now.
Aww. What a sweetheart. Frustrating, yes, but the best outcome is that he’s willing to learn from you and his mistakes. It really is the thought that counts. If I was you, I’d send your dad the new batch and give your hubby credit for helping.
Frustration, maybe not. But feeling kind of hopeless? yes. Just when I finally think I can get my car fixed this month, Josh suddenly demands I pay ALL of the rent this month…which I cannot afford on my own. I just barely started working again. From September to February, all of my income was from ebay sales. I was getting by but barely. Hes holding me to this “but you said you’d pay the rent this month” because I said something last month. I also told him recently I wont have enough to cover even my half this week because I only worked 2 days on this check. He does NOTHING around the house, and I’m expected to pay the bills AND do the housework? We had an agreement-he’d pay the bills, I’d do the housework, cooking, cleaning etc.. I’d pay the cable and water bills (about $150 combined) he makes TWICE what I do, and ITS NOT FAIR!!!! >.< So I had to shell out $300 last night to him, that I had to borrow, so that means this coming friday, I wont get my check because I have to pay back the loan. And yet, he has $1,000-$900 disposable income every month, even AFTER paying all of the rent and *I* have to pay?? WHAT THE HE**!! He says, "its not about how much *I* make" and tells me I need to clear out the second bedroom I'm using as an office/reptile/Windstone room because he needs a roomate that is more "consistant". (and um, when did I start becoming a roomate? I'm his girlfriend!) B.S! Excuse me, I've been looking for a job. I haven't had a permanante job since 2009. Since then its been temporary stuff! I don't even have time to focus on school work, so I can finish school, get a degree, and get a "real" job because I'm catering to his every whim. And yet he still walks around with this dark storm cloud over his head of stress and…I dont know? He wont talk to me, and I'm kind of afraid to ask. He doesn't realize how good he has it. All he has to do is go to work. He comes home, showers, sits in bed, watches TV and expects me to feed him and keep him satisfied. I do everything for him except be cheery and upbeat and happy/perky 100% of the time (because Im stressed out about not being able to pay my own bills-I have credit cards and debts-he doesn't. He does owe a collection agency, but he just doesn't pay them), but most days I "fake it till you feel it" (like my 4th grade teacher always said) and try to put on a smile because every day for him is worse than the last. He can't handle stress, he crumbles. Its….frustrating.
hate to say it but doesn’t sound like he deserves to have you, Wolfen…a boyfriend shouldn’t be treating you like a check and hired help…besides you shouldn’t have to fake it until you feel it, yes we all have our bad days with our mates but this doesn’t sound at all right what’s happening with you….
you don’t have money yet he suddenly expects you to pay all of rent? I don’t know about high your’s is but my rent is like $1115 I think now(hubby and I split it and help the other if one has problems paying their half), that’s a lot to ask a person even if your rent is waaay lower than mine who doesn’t have a job….
4 things I'm looking for:
1. Mother Meerkat
2. production color Sitting Young Oriental dragons to be made in more colors besides VF
3. Female Griffin – Siamese with White
4. September Raffle Prize 2022 AHD Male GriffinWolfen, if he’s treating you like this now, and he’s only a boyfriend, things are only going to get worse! Get out of there while you still can! Please! I hate to sound like a pessimist, but no amount of talking things out is going to fix what kind of a person he is. Please don’t let him take up any more of your life. Move back in with your folks if you have to, but don’t live with him. I’ve known way too many women who end up with awful men and get themselves into a position where they can’t leave. Don’t let this happen to you!
And as an added perspective: When my parents got divorced my mom actually let my dad come back home (because she is too nice for her own good) and he told her she could pay everything because he was “just a guest” in our home. That sounds way too similar to him calling you a roommate to me. RED FLAGS!
he could also be being mean to her to drive her away so he doesn’t have to be the dumper, I’ve heard many men use this tactic to break up…
arg, my second story part makes me feel stupid even now so removed it….
4 things I'm looking for:
1. Mother Meerkat
2. production color Sitting Young Oriental dragons to be made in more colors besides VF
3. Female Griffin – Siamese with White
4. September Raffle Prize 2022 AHD Male GriffinWolfen, I haven’t been on the forum that long (less than two years) but you have been dealing with Josh all the time I have been here. Maybe it IS time to step back and look at the situation. I know it is hard – I was married over 30 years and probably would be still if my ex hadn’t decided it was easier to go forward with somebody else instead of working things out with me – so the impulse to hang on/keep trying is very strong. As Fatal says, curse you young (or not so young) love! However, in the end you might just feel that life is easier if you are not carrying him too. Good luck!
P.S. Well, Fatal did say “Curse you young love” before that part of her post went away. LOL
P.S. Well, Fatal did say “Curse you young love” before that part of her post went away. LOL
that I did, I always feel dumb when I admit that part of my past with stupid first ex so ended up making it poof!
back on topic, yes, I did leave an ass of a first ex after what he did but then, I met a guy a bit later, he worked as the healer for me mostly, making me feel like guys can be good…second ex let me go, wasn’t right for us then soon after I met my husband….so bad, helper then husband! sure I had to go through some crap but hey! rings on my finger with an awesome husband!
I wasted nearly 4 years of my life with an ass of an ex….met my husband after a bit and I’ve been with my husband for 4 years now and soon will be celebrating my first wedding anniversary next month!
4 things I'm looking for:
1. Mother Meerkat
2. production color Sitting Young Oriental dragons to be made in more colors besides VF
3. Female Griffin – Siamese with White
4. September Raffle Prize 2022 AHD Male Griffin(and um, when did I start becoming a roommate? I’m his girlfriend!) B.S!
You aren’t his girlfriend. You’re his Mom.
Ah, I talked to hubby at lunch. He said he was just upset they didn’t come out right, and when I come home and make the new batch, could he please watch so he can learn to do them right in case this happens again? Okay…so…deep breath, and sigh, now.
Aww. What a sweetheart. Frustrating, yes, but the best outcome is that he’s willing to learn from you and his mistakes. It really is the thought that counts. If I was you, I’d send your dad the new batch and give your hubby credit for helping.
I agree, that was so sweet of your husband to try and help!
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