Frustration Scream Thread!

[twindragonsmum]

Unrelated – do you read Rants from Mommyland?

I haven’t heard of it but sounds interesting…

twindragonsmum

tdm

[fatalbeauty]

sorry to hear this had to happen to you, boys can be such idiotic jerks sometimes no matter how old they get….

…a few things I can recommend though, doing things you know you love will keep your mind off it for a bit…also one that always helped clear my mind when I didn’t want to think about something was to take a recent movie I had seen or an old favorite and try to play it out in your head from beginning to end the best you can….the last one worked the best when I couldn’t sleep due to heartache….

4 things I'm looking for:
1. Mother Meerkat
2. production color Sitting Young Oriental dragons to be made in more colors besides VF, Brimstone would be awesome!
3. Female Griffin – Siamese with White
4. September Raffle Prize 2022 AHD Male Griffin

[Brandy]

Thankies for all the support and good words – It’s really helped… My new mantra is

“I can do hard things”

I may not like to do hard things but they are do-able and in the long run me boyohs and I will be all the better off because I CAN do hard things.

tdm

You have a great new Motto TDM….

You can and you will do just fine. You are a woman and we dig down deep, find the strength. We get what needs to be done…done, we struggle and we face adversity and we come out better. I have been there after a 10yr marriage and 2 young boys and I was terrified. I had no job skills, complete self doubt and concern for my ability to PROVIDE. I dug deep, faced my personal fears for my 2 boys sake, found my inner strength, got a job, took the help that the system offered and I DID IT. I provided a great home, bought my first car (and paid for it on my own YEAH….so proud of myself), supported my children on my own and I feel so good about it.

You will be OK and your boys are more than old enough to be heard on where they want to live. You are a strong woman with many skills gained through being a stay at home mom that we never even realize we have. Sometimes it is the stay at home mom whom devalues themselves the most. Trust me, If I found some useful skills from Mothering than so can you. I became a Cook at a restaurant and I was GOOD at it!!! Who knew. From there I got some more education and ended up with an amazing job with a Cellulose Pulp company! Never thought I’d be in that field!!!! Again who knew!!!

My divorce ended up being the best thing that happened to me and my boys. Our life is better, I have an amazing partner that values me and stands fast by my side, and 2 more wonderful kids.

You are WOMAN….WE’LL HEAR YOU ROAR!!! Cliche I know but so true!!!

🙂 🙂 Many Huggs, much understanding and all my support to you from afar!! 🙂 🙂

[Victoria]

Thankies for all the support and good words – It’s really helped… My new mantra is

“I can do hard things”

I may not like to do hard things but they are do-able and in the long run me boyohs and I will be all the better off because I CAN do hard things.

tdm

You will absolutely all be better off in the long run. I guarantee it. You just have to hang on & see it through.

For the times when your mantra isn’t enough, try mine (credited to Abe Lincoln): “I can do anything for 15 minutes.”

I’ll admit, there are days where I have to break it down to FIVE minute increments, but knowing you can deal with small chunks, take a break, and then have at it again (or work on something else) for another fifteen minutes really does make it easier to get through some things.

(And for Kaytana–it even works for creativity issues. Twice a week, there’s a task on my to do list: I’ll set the timer on my phone for fifteen minutes and cope with my current WIP, like it or not, knowing that when the timer goes off, I’m free to escape. Of course, once I’ve gotten through that first push, I tend to silence the timer and just keep going–but on the days where all I want to do is take a sword to the computer, it’s enough to know I did what I’d committed to do! There’s also an odd sense of finally actually achieving a goal, even though the project is far from complete, because for eighteen straight weeks, I’ve done at least two writing sessions a week. I can’t remember the last time I felt like I’d actually accomplished something, but now, I’ve come so far, just the thought of blowing that record is motivation enough to keep going.)

[KaytanaPhoenix]

(And for Kaytana–it even works for creativity issues. Twice a week, there’s a task on my to do list: I’ll set the timer on my phone for fifteen minutes and cope with my current WIP, like it or not, knowing that when the timer goes off, I’m free to escape. Of course, once I’ve gotten through that first push, I tend to silence the timer and just keep going–but on the days where all I want to do is take a sword to the computer, it’s enough to know I did what I’d committed to do! There’s also an odd sense of finally actually achieving a goal, even though the project is far from complete, because for eighteen straight weeks, I’ve done at least two writing sessions a week. I can’t remember the last time I felt like I’d actually accomplished something, but now, I’ve come so far, just the thought of blowing that record is motivation enough to keep going.)

That is actually a very good idea! Thank you for that 🙂 I will have to try this!
Currently I’ve figured out my painting I’ve been having probs with has its deadline bumped up from 3 weeks, to 1 week (Thank you dad for giving me the wrong dates we do a dogshow on! Which is when I give this woman her painting) I have one week to paint and one week to get it back from the printers (Shouldn’t take that logn but I like to buffer that time some)
Now that I’ve run into my deadline, I will crunch time the painting.. I do horribly when I’m pushed to work, but bust out my best work when I run into my deadlines, its backwards, lol!

[Victoria]

Currently I’ve figured out my painting I’ve been having probs with has its deadline bumped up from 3 weeks, to 1 week (Thank you dad for giving me the wrong dates we do a dogshow on! Which is when I give this woman her painting) I have one week to paint and one week to get it back from the printers (Shouldn’t take that logn but I like to buffer that time some)
Now that I’ve run into my deadline, I will crunch time the painting.. I do horribly when I’m pushed to work, but bust out my best work when I run into my deadlines, its backwards, lol!

I think there’s a fully justified frustration scream towards Dad in there. 🙂

But yeah, there’s something about imminent deadlines that brings out the best in a lot of people. At least it’ll be over and done with soon!

[KaytanaPhoenix]

Currently I’ve figured out my painting I’ve been having probs with has its deadline bumped up from 3 weeks, to 1 week (Thank you dad for giving me the wrong dates we do a dogshow on! Which is when I give this woman her painting) I have one week to paint and one week to get it back from the printers (Shouldn’t take that logn but I like to buffer that time some)
Now that I’ve run into my deadline, I will crunch time the painting.. I do horribly when I’m pushed to work, but bust out my best work when I run into my deadlines, its backwards, lol!

I think there’s a fully justified frustration scream towards Dad in there. 🙂

But yeah, there’s something about imminent deadlines that brings out the best in a lot of people. At least it’ll be over and done with soon!

Yeah, I have a handful of frustration screams right at the moment.. been holding a good handful of them in.. but the show date one isn’t a massive shock, isn’t the first time.. I didn’t triple check it though because I heard the wrong date by several people.. I just didn’t get the update when dad was told the *actual* date >.<
Dogshow photography for me is nothing but stress usually.. so I have a different way of handling it than my usual frustrations, it doesn't surprise me as much so it doesn't get to me as much… though this next show, things could get interesting… club president isn't on my good side by any means after the last show (You have the bigger clubs like AKC, UKC etc.. 'n then sub-clubs for the area… this is a sub club I'm having issues with)

Anywho, yes! I'm looking forward to this painting being done, it's what is standing between me and my PYO dragons XD

[Victoria]

From what I’ve seen, dog shows in general are just one big stressor. It’s been a long while since I’ve been to one; I hit several in one year while deciding on the right standard schnauzer breeder to go with (and then to get my fix while I sat on the wait list for our first pup), and the barely controlled chaos of them was pretty amazing to an outsider. So much politics going on behind the scenes, and professional handlers who ranged from very nice to completely obnoxious. Yeesh. I don’t envy you.

Agility, on the other hand, was even more chaotic, but it was a lot of fun on both sides of the arena, and from behind the camera. Photographing agility is like any other sports photography; fast paced and fun, as long as you know where to point the camera. LOL Unfortunately my divorce ended Kaya’s chances of getting fully trained on that score, and her “brother” (who’s actually her half nephew? Cousin once removed? Bloodlines are nutty.) is both as dumb as a box of rocks, and just about as coordinated. Agility is not in his future. I regularly tell him, “Your father (K’s half brother) took Best of Breed at Westminster, and I don’t think you inherited ANY of his good points.” And he just looks at me and goes, “Food? Pets? No? OK, I’ll go bark at the cats again. Or maybe steal something else to give to my friend the tree.” The other day, it was a knitting project, complete with wooden needles. Hubby just followed the trail of yarn out the dog door…

And there’s a frustration scream for you: This dog has lived with the same two cats for over three years. Why are they still so endlessly fascinating? Every day–heck, every hour!–he acts as though he’s never seen them before. And if it has to be that way, can’t he at least be quiet about it???

I miss my Maine Coon. He was the best puppy trainer ever.

[KaytanaPhoenix]

haha, Agility is chaos, but it looks fun, never tried it myself, I always figured I’d get lost XD lmao! Rally Obedience is a newer one that is also supposed to be quite fun…
I’ve always wanted to do flyball with my dog, but she’s one who likes to chase/be chased.. so actually bringing the ball back she isn’t so into doing XD haha

I hear ya on dogs that make the black crayon look bright! Had one or two of those in our time! That’s why I’m so thankful to have Kilala, my Dutch Shepherd, smartest dog ever some days (Though not always that bright) if she can think a problem through it’ll be pure brilliance that she comes up with, but if she has to be quick on her feet, she usually fails. one of my faves was her walking down the stairs at a my brothers house (When I lived there) and her right side was touching the wall, and for some random reason she decided to turn around, instead of turning left, she turned right… face into the wall! I laughed so hard I almost fell down the stairs XD
‘n if it makes you feel any better my parents have a dog that barks at you when you walk OUT the door… standing there, watching you go… it isn’t separation anxiety or anything like that, it’s the “Alert!” bark… truly bewilders me! lol
Isn’t barking sort of a schnauzer thing to do? I don’t know the breed that well, never really interested me…

Thankfully in UKC the handlers prob isn’t a prob. It’s against the rules to hire handlers to show your dogs in UKC (ANY kind of payment to someone to show your dogs is against the rules) So at that point it’s only when a handler is showing their own dogs… so it’s a lot more laid back. ‘n we very rarely photograph an AKC show, the way we do photos can’t handle the volume of most AKC shows, though we’ve done nationals (Bigger usually week long shows that’re specific to a breed) and obedience AKC. I’m always trying to think of ways to work around that issue of not being able to photograph the bigger AKC shows… if I can work AKC shows I won’t have the money probs I have now! lol
But yeah, the dogshow world chaos has got to be insane from the point of view of someone who doesn’t do it. I was raised with it so it’s all second nature to me.. the politics is what I don’t like, people play them big time too, that’s why I quit showing when I was young, n I had several big name handlers who wanted me to be their protege… had I followed that route, again, I’d not have the money issues I do now, lmao.. but I’d also probably be a royal b*tch XD Few n far between do I run into a handler I like…

I think my biggest frustration scream I have w dogshow photography, is when I go to a new show (The one coming up is one we’ve done for years so people know the routine) — The day we set-up I’m usually in jeans a tshirt with a hoody on, no makeup or anything.. so everyone will *only* talk to my dad… to them, I’m just his teenage daughter who doesn’t know sh*t (By the way, I’m 27, so teenage isn’t even accurate, lol)… The first day of showing I dress it up a step nicer, not super fancy but presentable, appropriate for the job, makeup etc.. but for the dogshow world I’m still quite young looking.. so they’ll only talk to my dad for the first bit, ignore me completely, or look at me like I’m speaking greek to them, then turn to my dad, who’ll repeat what I said, if not point them back to me, lol…
‘n then it dawns on them. – If you don’t listen to me when I tell you how to stand your dog in the photo. It probably was standing wrong. ‘n believe my dad is all the power you want, after he hits that shutter button… the memory card goes into my possession, ‘n at this point in time, you’ll no longer have a reason to say a word to him until you’re paying.. ‘n even then, odds are good you’ll pay with me as well. – Ignoring the person who has complete control over how nice of a photo you get, is a bad.bad.bad idea.. 😀 (I have a high standard of what I will let pass through, but being nice, gets even more attention) by the end of a weekend, people don’t even bother asking my dad anything anymore… I can, do and will help up to 10 people at ONE time… answering questions, hand writing receipts, scrolling through photos for people to pick which one they want, editing photos on site (We dual monitor our pcs ‘n mirror my screen so people get to watch what I do, they love it!), copying photos to jump drives, keeping track where that jump drive goes, and jumping up and making sure the dogs that’re getting photographed are standing right/get their attention…. all at literally the same time… no one can yet explain how I do it XD – but every time we have a new show.. I have to prove myself all over again to get any respect at all… x.x It’s very frustrating, though slightly satisfying the look they get when it finally dawns on them who has most control over their photos XD

[twindragonsmum]

Dad will be in hospital a couple of days. They think he’s leaking blood internally, just can’t find where. He’s had a transfusion but still more testing to be done.

tdm

So, an update on my dad… His doctors have found that he has cancer; a form of lymphoma. They’ve found spots on his kidneys and lungs. It’s highly aggressive. Went from normal bloodwork to near death in less than 2 weeks. He and mum were told that without treatment he might live anothoer 2 weeks; with treatment he could be cancer free in less than 3 years. Mum told him the decission was his and that she would support him entirely either way he chose. Dad has decided to fight so chemo starts today. They’ll keep him in hospital another week or se and then we see how things are progressing.

Thanks to all of you who’ve responded with cyber hugs and support and those that have pm’d and emailed. You don’t know how much I appreciate all your kind thoughts and prayers. Any continued efforts at good thoughts, prayers, etc. would be vastly enjoyed. Thank you so, so much for being my “other family” It means so much.

tdm

tdm

[Brandy]

Dad will be in hospital a couple of days. They think he’s leaking blood internally, just can’t find where. He’s had a transfusion but still more testing to be done.

tdm

So, an update on my dad… His doctors have found that he has cancer; a form of lymphoma. They’ve found spots on his kidneys and lungs. It’s highly aggressive. Went from normal bloodwork to near death in less than 2 weeks. He and mum were told that without treatment he might live anothoer 2 weeks; with treatment he could be cancer free in less than 3 years. Mum told him the decission was his and that she would support him entirely either way he chose. Dad has decided to fight so chemo starts today. They’ll keep him in hospital another week or se and then we see how things are progressing.

Thanks to all of you who’ve responded with cyber hugs and support and those that have pm’d and emailed. You don’t know how much I appreciate all your kind thoughts and prayers. Any continued efforts at good thoughts, prayers, etc. would be vastly enjoyed. Thank you so, so much for being my “other family” It means so much.

tdm

So sorry for all the difficulties that you must now face. Be strong, love your family and you will get through all of this. I truly hope that your Dad will be alright. Chemo will go well and he will get through this too.

Lotsa Love, Support and Distant Huggs from your Windstone Family TDM.

[KaytanaPhoenix]

Dad will be in hospital a couple of days. They think he’s leaking blood internally, just can’t find where. He’s had a transfusion but still more testing to be done.

tdm

So, an update on my dad… His doctors have found that he has cancer; a form of lymphoma. They’ve found spots on his kidneys and lungs. It’s highly aggressive. Went from normal bloodwork to near death in less than 2 weeks. He and mum were told that without treatment he might live anothoer 2 weeks; with treatment he could be cancer free in less than 3 years. Mum told him the decission was his and that she would support him entirely either way he chose. Dad has decided to fight so chemo starts today. They’ll keep him in hospital another week or se and then we see how things are progressing.

Thanks to all of you who’ve responded with cyber hugs and support and those that have pm’d and emailed. You don’t know how much I appreciate all your kind thoughts and prayers. Any continued efforts at good thoughts, prayers, etc. would be vastly enjoyed. Thank you so, so much for being my “other family” It means so much.

tdm

Ohh no 🙁 I’m glad they found it! That’s scarier than I can even imagine 🙁 At least he’s fighting it! I wish you and your family the best with all these hard times! By the end of all of this, you’ll all be so much stronger, as individuals and as a family

[Kristen]

TDM, I think your sons have a lot of choice in who they want to be with at their age. As it is, you’re a very strong woman! I’ve only known you through your posts on the forum, and I believe you can do anything you put your mind to – you’ll get through this and you’ll be even tougher for it. I can’t say I know what you’re going through, but I’ll definitely be thinking about you.

As for your dad – I sure hope the chemo works and I’m glad to hear he wants to fight. Cancer is a hard battle for anyone, and a hard battle for their loved ones as well. *hugs*

[Carolyn]

I just want to scream my head off today . Stress and depression . Ugh . Feels better just talking about it . More relaxed now .

[LadyFirebird]

My turn to scream a little bit–first I want to send hugs and positive to TDM. Sorry about your dad and all the things you are currently going through–care to scream with me?

Right now I’m just frustrated and tired of everything. I’m tired of studying, doing homework and all the freaking hoops I have to jump just to try and get this certificate so I can hopefully become employed. Being unemployed for the past couple of years has taken a financial toll on me and if I can’t find work by the end of this year I may have to consider early retirement. Don’t want to do that because it will be at a cut rate. I may have to sell out and move. Not quite ready to do that. I’m just tired of everything–just couldn’t bring myself to do homework today–tired of the 7 day grind.

I wish I had the luxury of extending these classes for another year but I don’t. It would have been a lot easier on me. Just don’t have any time to think. I’ve had it! I’m hoping that all this will be worth it in the end!

[Author]

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