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Shame on that man! Ski is right, his tactics are pure manipulation, and it must hurt the boys to be treated like that because it shows that he has no respect or thought for them. Holding the cats hostage is such a small-minded act; I doubt he cares for the cats one bit, he just wants the boys to stay.
Not to add stress to your life, but do you have any cause to think that the cats might be in danger? Because Rod’s behavior has been so petty that I wonder if he might harm the cats just to “get back at” anyone who does things he doesn’t like. What I’m getting at is, the cats mean a lot to your sons, and maybe it would be appropriate to talk to your advocate about this.
If the boys live in different places for a time, well, sometimes young people need “space” as they sort out who they are. It’s like going off to college: it’s a time for growing, but it’s not likely to change their family bond. I agree that I hate to think of either of them living within Rod’s reach, though: his behavior is poisonous in the extreme and really undeserving of having any of you around. When he stops obsessing about his own bruised ego and starts behaving like an adult, then he’ll be decent company. How long that takes is up to Rod; the answer could be “never,” so don’t worry yourself about it, and don’t for a minute take on any blame for his bad behavior.
Hang in there!
You don’t deserve any of this slime that Rod is throwing out! *hugs* and my thoughts and prayers are with you! I just hate that he is playing with your boys’ emotions too. Rod is a manipulative power-playing jerk. 🙁 My dad, when my parents were going through a divorce did many of these same things. He tried to turn my sisters and I against our mom, and it worked-but only for a little while. He would convince us that our mom was going to hell and that she was a horrible person…he tried to take custody away by lying and saying she was doing drugs and trying to leave the state. She was doing none of the above. My grandma told me, that he came to her (while she was in the hospital recovering from a heart-attack) stating that if she testified against her daughter-my mom- and if he got custody, he would make sure she got custody of us girls instead. According to grandma, that was a “light bulb” moment for her, and she realized his game was just to hurt my mom. Power playing butt-hols are despicable in my book, and I just hope that your boys will realize you have their best interest at heart. *HUGS*
Well, trial phase of divorce is now over, we have the judges decision, all we need now is the final decree. Sean has chosen to do his senior year of high school in Utah while Ethan has decided to finish up in Idaho. If I go back to Idaho, then I feel like I’m abandoning Sean and if I stay in Utah I feel like I’m abandoning Ethan – what a mess… The morning Sean and I were leaving for Utah I got a phone call from Rod. He said if I left the state with Sean he would swear out a warrant for my arrest on the grounds of kidnapping and would have Sean listed as a run away. I hope that there are no nasty suprises waiting at the apartment for me us when we get back. Sean and I go back this weekend to pick up his kitty and more of his stuff to take back to Utah. YERRRRGGG!!! Why can’t this just be over and done with? It’s been two stinking years already!
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Oh My TDM, I have just caught up on this thread, your ex is acting like a spoiled child, thank dog your boys are almost 18 and he cant use them as pawns for spite, I really think he would. Im sorry you have to go through all of this, hugs.
Yeeaargh about covers it. I’m echoing the sentiment that I’m glad the boys are just shy of 18 and not, say, 8. I swear it’s like some people never grow up past second grade. Yikes.
What an ass! I really, really hope things will end up working out positively for your and your boys eventually TDM. 🙁 I can’t believe Rod would hold the kitties hostage; that’s absolutely despicable! Anyway, I wish you and Sean tons of luck on your ‘grabbing stuff and rescuing cat’ mission!
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Excellent!
Yeeaargh about covers it. I’m echoing the sentiment that I’m glad the boys are just shy of 18 and not, say, 8. I swear it’s like some people never grow up past second grade. Yikes.
A-freaking-men. With the boys so close to being legal adults, at least they have some say in the matter.
Hang in there, TDM.
The ink hasn’t even dried on the proposed final decree and I just got papers from my attorney telling me that another hearing has been called because Rod is trying to get the amount of maintanence lowered…. *sigh* What will he think of next? (said with disgust)
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Hugs!
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http://www.sarahjestin.com/feedbacklists.htmI can’t believe this! What is his problem? I do seriously think he has mental problems. Won’t let it go and won’t let it alone. Someone else mentioned that the past is his but the future is yours. He just can’t move on can he?
Hold Your Head Up -Argent
Hang in there baby!We are all rooting for you and believe me,Karma works,give it time and let it be.Watch it happen. 😉 Then you can laugh out loud as you want,scream and/or cry until it hurts,cleanse your Soul and voila!You will be free. 🙂 You will have cut the ties that bind.He is doing that just to hurt you,yank you around for the last times he can because he knows he has lost you.You have the power to change how he affects you.Don’t let him push your buttons.Keep your tight relationships with your boys and you will see.He is losing his grip of control over you and that kind of personality does not like not being in control.That’s all it is.Because he can.Remember,we are stronger.Trust me.I have been there. 😉Every act matters.No matter how small💞
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Male Hearth....one day🤞Dream on.I can’t believe this! What is his problem? I do seriously think he has mental problems. Won’t let it go and won’t let it alone. Someone else mentioned that the past is his but the future is yours. He just can’t move on can he?
Hang in there TDW things have got to get better for you and like Lady Firebird said he is the past and you are the future. Now that this horrible divorce is done remember that – the future is your to do with what you want. Maybe as soon as the boys turn 18 you can really get him out of your lives. Best of luck
I have nothing nice to say about Him and my momma taught me if you have nothing nice to say…… Just make this face :tongue:
Sorry…. Hope you all get my support of you TDM and my NON support of the A Hole!! Darnit…. Gotta call mom and tell her I couldn’t hold my tongue.
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