Grief support group

I wish I knew, we lost our first baby by miscarraige and I ended up coping alone….I would break down when we passed a baby section in a store even…PM or email me at prplcat@mail.com. *hugs* 😥

I’m so sorry you guys have had to go through something so terrible. 😥

Talk all you need, we’ll be here. 🙂

DragonMistress,

I don’t know of any online support groups, but if you need to talk I’m available. I’ve talked about my twins, in fact they are part of my online name, but what I don’t say often is that we started the pregnancy with four little munchkins and I miscarried two really early on. We thought we were gonna loose the whole shooting match; it was our one and only pregnancy. So, if you need a shoulder, please feel free to use mine. My boys will be tweleve on the 29th of this month and I still do miss my other two boys. As a side note, when Ethan and Sean were turning three they had an interesting “twin” conversation and came to ask me if the “two other brothers would be turning three with us if they were here?” My hubby and I hadn’t yet told the boys that they were actually quads…

twindragonsmum

I am sorry to hear about your loss. The only other support groups I have seen are the ones online, so I know I won’t be much of a help. I know that these other people will though!

I’m glad you found a support group. I understand how you feel about your grandmother. I’ve found that one of the best things to do IS to TALK about it; the lost pregnancy. Your baby was and still is your baby. You don’t have to think that by talking about it that you will spoil the other family members good news. I completely understand your anger and grief over someone elses pregnancy and not being able to talk about yours. My husband and I had a similar situation in the unfitness of a pregnant family member when we couldn’t get pregnant to save our lives. Hubby’s sister kept getting pregnant while living in her parents home, having been married twice. Once the baby reached about three she’d have another baby and foist the three year old off onto her daughter who wasn’t much older herself. Mom and Dad had both asked then told her she couldn’t have any more kids while she and hubby number two lived there, but she would always tell them that it was accidental (“the condom broke” “the pill failed”) when we all knew that they did it on purpose (“Don’t tell mom and dad but we did it on purpose”) Don’t let yourself feel any guilt over what you are now experiencing. Those emotions and feelings are perfectly normal. It doesn’t matter that your pregnancy was two years ago. You will still miss that child and you do need to talk about it. It helped for me that my mother in law was a labor and delivery nurse and had experienced the death of one of her unborn children. It happened at a time when the doctors thought it better that you not see or hold the child, but moms nursing friends didn’t go for that. They cleaned up the baby, wrapped him in a soft blanket and let both mom and dad hold him and say good bye. Mom said he was perfect; red hair, perfectly formed hands, fingers, toes. He just died before he was born. With our miscarriage we focused on the two babies we had left. Do I still miss the two that miscarried? YES! Are they still my children? YES! My religious beliefs tell me that I will have those children to raise in the after life; that they know that I am their mother and that they have a family they belong to. It also helped that my surviving boys wanted to know about their “two other brothers” and named them (Liam and Aidan). Does it still hurt that they are not here now? Sometimes; especially about a week or two before the boys birthday. But it helps that I have family and friends who love and care for me and my family, and that I can cry about it almost twelve years later and they still understand. Talk about your baby. Tell your family. Understand also that the generation our parents and grandparents come from didn’t talk about miscarriage. They generally didn’t even talk about being pregnant until it started to be obvious. That may be part of the reason your mom doesn’t want to speak about it. If you can find a time when it feels appropriate to talk about your baby then do so. Hope this helps.

twindragonsmum