The Only Thing I Can Make… drag0n's Cornchowder

So… I am a terrible cook. Always have been. I don’t know why. I’m Italian… I should have marinara running through my veins but even though I may… it doesn’t help me cook.

But there is one thing I can make… and it’s corn chowder… I know… random right?

Anyway… it’s actually really damn good so here’s my completely half-assed recipe. Nothing has to be perfect here (this is probably why I can make it)

What you will need

2 – 3 cans of creamed corn
1 big white onion
a bag of gold or white potatoes
a pack of bacon
a package of sharp cheese (I usually use those cracker barrel ones)
1 pint of heavy cream
Italian seasoning (oregano, basil, dill, that kind of stuff)

optional, a couple scallions

So 1st get a package of bacon. Whatever kind of bacon you want. I use the cheap stuff just cause you’re gonna fry it up to a crisp anyway.

So get a pot, yes a pot. I big old soup pot and cook your bacon in that. Fry it up piece by piece so it’s super crispy and not all clear and fatty anymore. Take them out bit by bit and set them aside on some paper towel until you have cooked ALL of said bacon. Do your best not to eat half of it as you go along. I usually fail here.

So after you do that you have a pot full of bacon grease, perfect.

Chop up the giant onion, mince if you like, and throw that in the hot grease and brown it up a bit. (scallion as well if you want, but it’s not needed) Once that is cooking you’re gonna want do a lazy peel on 6 – 8 potatoes, wash and chop those up as well. Add about 2 to 3 coups of water to your onions and add the potatoes in.

Let that cook covered, until the potatoes are almost done. Maybe 8 – 10 minutes stirring up occasionally.

In the mean time you’re gonna rip up that bacon like it owes you money. Chop it , crumble it, pound it in a ziplock bag, whatever then your gonna add the bacon back in along with your cans of creamed corn and stir that mess all up.

Pretend you are on a cooking show and throw some random spices and stuff in there. I like dill a lot apparently. Probably cause it’s a funny sounding name. Then you can add about half that cheese block. Cut it into slices and add it in and let it all cook for a few more minutes. Stir once in a while.

Then very slowly add your cream in and reduce to a simmer. I like the heavy cream because why not make this more unhealthy then it already is, but if you’re health conscious you can use the reduced fat too. Give it a slow stir and gaze upon the feast before you.

Because you’re done. You’re lazy, but delicious chowder is complete and ready for consumption.

Yay.