Discouraged

I’m so sorry that there are members here that have treated you so poorly. Sadly that’s the internet for you, though I’ve always seen WS as a more trustworthy place, but as places get bigger/more popular you run the risk of running into some rotten apples. Just remember that there are more good peeps than the bad! As for the problem with sharing GBs on the forums, I know I’ve run into a member before that left a bad taste in my mouth when it came to a GB piece of mine, when that happens you just gotten ignore and vow never to work with them in the future.

Just know there are a lot of us here that are happy to have you here and very much want you to stay and be active!

*hugs*

So Sorry to hear that you’ve had issues Matty.
This is so Not Cool … We need to respect each other, People.
Please be considerate and remember the ‘Golden Rule’ ~ “Do unto Others as You would have Done unto You.”

Sorry to hear about this Matty. We had a similar issue on here, I believe,  about a year ago . As I recall most of us felt as you do about it. One or two message were appropriate, but after that it is harassment. I agree with the others who have already posted. Block the member causing issues and be sure to let a moderator know what is going on.

I hope that you get the final issue with the Tadpoad swap taken care of as well. Things like that would leave a sour taste in anyones mouth.

Respect is key for everyone. It is to bad that some have no idea what respect of others actually is.

Try not to let a few bad apples ruin what is a generally good and caring forum for you.

I want to write an official rule to make sure people know that harassing one another to sell pieces is not okay. We have a “no harassment” rule, but maybe it’s unclear on what it means to harass, especially when trying to buy a piece that’s not for sale…

As community members, how do you suggest I approach this?

I don’t really want to go so far as to say that simply contacting each other about any item NOT listed in the classifieds is against the rules, unless you guys really think it should be this way. I have always felt that “I like your dragon, please let me know if you ever want to sell it someday” is pretty innocent (if not repeated!). Am I wrong?

I’d appreciate your thoughts on this. I don’t want the forum to be unwelcoming.

Disclaimer: I suspect some of you will have different opinions on what level of contact/inquiry is okay … I will consider all standpoints and do my best to compromise the best solution for everyone.

I’m sorry to hear this is upsetting you so much, Matty! Yes, most of us have been harassed about pieces we don’t want to sell. I know that most of us have been subject to an upsetting volume of email, many many emails in an hour, from a forum member in the last few months. Also, demands that I tell them exactly what pieces I have, and badgering requests for pictures of pieces I have explicitly said are not for trade or sale. I would suggest you block them on both the forum and your email. It’s unfortunate that some people don’t understand the social niceties that usually make it clear that someone is not interested in further contact. But some people just don’t. That’s when it is really time to use the block buttons. Trust me, your anxiety levels go down when you remove problematic people from your life, and it’s not that hard to do online.

We’ve probably all run into a bad trade here or there. As Kim mentioned, most of us got our pieces in the end (or in my case the WRONG piece, not what I bought, but I was just ready to be done with the whole thing and let it go). 95% of my trades have gone perfectly. Another 4% have had issues like late shipping, or package damage, but that’s not as much a concern and they mostly worked out in the end. The 1% of bad experiences are awful, but it seems like there are still far more good people on here than the bad. I’d also HIGHLY suggest everyone always check the feedback lists before trading. Obviously, there can be two sides to every story, but there’s also no smoke without fire.

Jennifer, as for your guidelines, I think that adjusting them is a superb idea. I never mind hearing a one time “I love your piece, if you ever decide to trade or sell it, or someone checking in every year to see if anything has changed. I have sold or traded pieces to people who asked years after they first approached me, and have bought pieces in the same way. I don’t mind polite people who acknowledge that the piece in question *Belongs to me and is mine to do with as I please* and ask to be contacted if that ever changes. What I mind is aggressive, multiple emails/messages  that make demands. No one is entitled to a piece just cos they want it. I’ve probably had 20 polite people ask me about pieces, some not in ads. I’ve had one very rude person who could not listen to social cues and still bugged me after they were told I was not going to discuss my collection with them/send them pictures/trade or sell to them. I understand that everyone will have a different opinion, but I’d say something along the lines of  “While it is OK to message a forum member asking if a piece they own is possibly available, harassing someone to sell or trade with you is never acceptable. If a forum member tells you a piece is not for sale or trade, continuing to solicit trade or sale of the piece may result in you being banned from the forum/messaging system. If a forum member asks you to stop contacting them, ONE message saying you understand and will not contact them again is acceptable. Any further communication may result in you being banned from the forum/messaging system.” That’s just my two cents!

I don’t know how often people like that read the forum, so maybe when you finalize the statement you want to make, it could be send out on the message system? Just to make sure it gets in front of as many eyes as possible? I don’t know if that’s feasible but I think it would be more effective.

Yeah, I think the raffle exception is a good idea, too. I think putting the raffle piece in your “wanted list” in the classified would be OK, but not contacting someone to sell/trade when they win. So here’s my new suggestion for guidelines:

“While it is OK to message a forum member asking if a piece they own is possibly available, harassing someone to sell or trade with you is never acceptable. If a forum member tells you a piece is not for sale or trade, continuing to solicit trade or sale of the piece may result in you being banned from the forum/messaging system. If a forum member asks you to stop contacting them, ONE message saying you understand and will not contact them again is acceptable. Any further communication may result in you being banned from the forum/messaging system. Raffle pieces are a special exception to the rules above. Please only contact a raffle winner if they have posted an ad in the classified section indicating they are looking to trade or sell their prize. It is not OK to solicit sale or trade of a raffle piece that has not been willingly offered for sale or trade by its owner.  ”

I am curious about the raffle exception. Would it not suffice to say that it’s not allowed to contact an owner more than once to express interest? This would cover ALL pieces. Why is a raffle item different than something someone fought hard for on eBay or got in a grab bag? I have seen many raffle winners go on to sell their piece.