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September 12, 2007 at 11:22 pm #615389
I hope it wasn’t directed at you, I never got the feeling you were playing the sympathy card, just sharing with friends 😀
September 12, 2007 at 11:45 pm #615390Don’t worry about it!!! You talk to us whenever you need to!!! We’re all friends here!!! 😀
September 12, 2007 at 11:49 pm #615391wolflodge100 wrote:I hope it wasn’t directed at you, I never got the feeling you were playing the sympathy card, just sharing with friends 😀
I second that!
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http://www.sarahjestin.com/feedbacklists.htmSeptember 13, 2007 at 12:23 am #615392Ditto!
September 13, 2007 at 2:38 am #615393Don’t worry about it purpledoggy. Keep us updated on how things are going!
You were missed Safyre! It’s just always vocalized! 😀
Being the skeptic that I am, I do have to say I don’t like the suspicion that this has caused. With no real evidence shown, it’s just all hearsay, rumour, or theoretical, which can lead to false accusations and finger pointing needlessly. If this was directed at someone in particular, I don’t see where posting something vague and cryptic accomplishes anything constructive. The community here is so inviting and supportive as compared with others I’ve know (online or otherwise) and I’d hate to see something as little as a vague suspicion fracture that. I’m not trying to come across as mean, but this is how the original post comes across to me.
September 13, 2007 at 2:58 am #615394sunhawk wrote:Well, statistically speaking, it is possible that someone will post here as a form of Munchausen’s By Internet. But that’s a pretty serious allegation and one I wouldn’t feel comfortable making without some sort of proof or evidence.
I am not sure how many here have a background in psychology, but there are some characters who post that certainly fit the profile.
I would never point out anyone specifically, but there are members that I would not give any personal information to. It is like this on any forum or in any community that you become involved with.
Unfortunately the internet leads to anonymity. And it is easy for some people to be a whole different person in the internet world.
I take the stance that you treat everyone nicely and with a grain of salt, you offer to help people as long as it doesn’t cost you any money. And you never, ever get so bonded with someone that you are taken advantage of.
Sympathy is free and easily given to anyone in distress and kind words never hurt anyone. So even if someone was looking for attention, it isn’t hurting me to put in a kind word!
You can’t get taken advantage of by saying “I hope things are better” or “I will be praying for you or thinking about you”.
I love to help people out, but I am careful that I don’t get taken advantage of….that is the best policy…..my 2 cents..
September 13, 2007 at 3:44 am #615395keschete wrote:sunhawk wrote:Well, statistically speaking, it is possible that someone will post here as a form of Munchausen’s By Internet. But that’s a pretty serious allegation and one I wouldn’t feel comfortable making without some sort of proof or evidence.
I am not sure how many here have a background in psychology, but there are some characters who post that certainly fit the profile.
I would never point out anyone specifically, but there are members that I would not give any personal information to. It is like this on any forum or in any community that you become involved with.
Unfortunately the internet leads to anonymity. And it is easy for some people to be a whole different person in the internet world.
I take the stance that you treat everyone nicely and with a grain of salt, you offer to help people as long as it doesn’t cost you any money. And you never, ever get so bonded with someone that you are taken advantage of.
Sympathy is free and easily given to anyone in distress and kind words never hurt anyone. So even if someone was looking for attention, it isn’t hurting me to put in a kind word!
You can’t get taken advantage of by saying “I hope things are better” or “I will be praying for you or thinking about you”.
I love to help people out, but I am careful that I don’t get taken advantage of….that is the best policy…..my 2 cents..
I agree with the majority of your advice, but I would like to point out that there is rarely a clear cut, black and white way to tell how a person really is on the Internet and that goes for thinking suspiciously of them as well as trusting them. By the same token that people can appear nice and honest, people can unknowingly and/or unintentionally come across as mean or untrustworthy. Online communication, especially when it’s of the strictly-text variety, often strips us of the subtle cues and clues to who we are and what our intentions are. I’m sure most of us have had experience in this area, where someone described us in a way that was so offbase from who we really are. It’s good to be cautious but it’s also good to be cautious about theories about other people, because we all make mistakes but once an accusation is made publically, character assasination is very difficult to take back.
That said, I don’t mean to downplay your instincts with people, if you don’t feel comfortable giving people personal information, that is most certainly your right.
September 13, 2007 at 2:21 pm #615396sunhawk wrote:I agree with the majority of your advice, but I would like to point out that there is rarely a clear cut, black and white way to tell how a person really is on the Internet and that goes for thinking suspiciously of them as well as trusting them.
I totally agree with that. It is very hard to use instinct to evaluate people from only their type written word. I meant that, if you see certain patterns and in general are not sure…then you can be nice and polite, but not give out information about yourself if you aren’t sure. Of course there is information you should never give to anyone, because you are right, sometimes you think someone is nice and honest and they turn out not to be.
As far as the sympathy thing…the community forum is a great place to vent and to share, and my earlier comments were not directed at anyone who has posted in this thread.
Purpledoggy, we are all rooting for you and your husband!!!! Keep us posted!
September 13, 2007 at 4:41 pm #615397I’d like to knwo who on here is being accused of faking things for false sympothy. If people do not think my mom passed in April I have her death certificates to prove it. It’s sad to me that we woudl get to the point where we would stop believing eachother.
Any one that would fake these things has a serious problem and needs helpJust my 2 cents
September 13, 2007 at 4:50 pm #615398Dragon Master wrote:I’d like to knwo who on here is being accused of faking things for false sympothy. If people do not think my mom passed in April I have her death certificates to prove it. It’s sad to me that we woudl get to the point where we would stop believing eachother.
Any one that would fake these things has a serious problem and needs helpJust my 2 centsDont be silly. See? Its started already. Everyone thinks its them. 🙄 I say no one worry about it till an accusation is made. The veiled accusation does not count. If folks have a problem offering sympathy for fear of being made to look like a fool, they dont have to post.
September 13, 2007 at 4:54 pm #615399I agree with a lot of you folks here. I would rather falsely believe a sad tale and offer support than be cold and disbelieving towards someone that honestly needed someone to listen to them. If I found out someone lied to me, I’d get over it, but if I found out I had hurt someone who was already upset, that would haunt me for a very long time.
At least I know the person who stands accused of telling tales isn’t me. If I said half the things that have happened to me here then you would all think I was both a liar and insane 😆
September 13, 2007 at 5:27 pm #615400Dragon Master wrote:I’d like to knwo who on here is being accused of faking things for false sympothy. If people do not think my mom passed in April I have her death certificates to prove it.
No-one has been named. It seems like a standard witch hunt to me, where you go into a crowd, shout out “You’re going to burn in hell!” and see who turns around with fear in their eyes. The fear is usually not because anyone has done anything particularly reprehensible, but because the person doing the shouting may have a wad of accusations, and a god-given license to torture.
September 13, 2007 at 5:31 pm #615401We should all not worry about it….if it was that big a problem for Safyre then hopefully she will confront that person and get it over with. I would think the person who she is talking about would also know it was them.
September 13, 2007 at 6:25 pm #615402Even Safyre admitted that she might be too cynical and therefore wrong.
The reality, as I see it, is that this forum is built on trust and love of windstones. It’s great to get to know people through this medium and to lend support and stories… but the trust extends beyond that. I have mailed stuff out and then, afterward, asked for the amount due. I’ve bought stuff from different forum members and 3 times had them mail my stuff before the check cleared. And the whole idea behind the PYO swap is trusting that everyone will carry through (and there is even understanding that stuff does happen, and it does not mean that the person had bad intentions). And without trust, GB would not have planned on and gotten to meet & stay with so many forum members. Even the responses to this thread have been positive, really.
I am happy to be part of this community! You guys are so much fun, and when someone needs support, it feels good to give what I can.Yay us! Love & hugs!
Now everyone pm safyre and say, “Is it me?” 😆 and then tell her it’s ok to come back!
September 13, 2007 at 8:08 pm #615403I was afraid of this.
I’d delete this whole thing- it really is a lot of unnecessary stress in a world where the bigger picture is looming right in front of us… Can’t see the forest for all the trees and all that. But I don’t want anyone to feel as if I feel their voice should be unheard.
Dave said it best here:
The Castle [Dave wrote:“]”The problem with the world today…”
No. The problem with the world today is that small things can get big press and cause upset far beyond those directly involved.
How many people play this on-line game? The equivalent of a small city? The equivalent of a large city? Compare that size of community to a normal city, where the newspaper lists all kinds of heinous crimes committed by and to people every day, then wonder how it can be that something so insignificant as a crazy person doing what crazy people do best (lying or killing themselves) can have everyone looking at their own friends in the expectation of finding someone there who is similarly crazy, and worrying about it.
What is lacking today is perspective. If someone is crying out for attention, the least of our worries ought to be “Am I being lied to?” You only need to worry about that if you are thinking of doing something, as a result of your communication with this person, that will have a major effect on your own life; like sending to them more money than you can afford to lose, or joining a cult, or selling your kids into slavery.
One of the GOOD things about this strange new perspective is that we are more aware now, than ever before, that there really are people out there waiting to con us. We get email scams every day, hear about mail and telephone scams, learn about credit-card and identity theft, and so on. So we are more skeptical about our interactions with people we don’t know well, and this can be a good self-defense mechanism.
I think that this skepticism goes too far, though, if it causes us to step back in fear of the possibility that we may be offering advice and encouragement to someone who, if we knew more, would not be deemed worthy of that advice or encouragement.
I mean, what does it cost us to be friendly and caring towards others? And are the rewards not normally worth it?
This forum is a place where we can collect, talk Windstones- but also be friends. Here in the community you can share with us when you have good days and bad days alike. You can come here for a high five when something goes your way, or comfort when something does not. However, ‘calling out’ someone in this manner, especially with no proof is only going to seed suspicion, unrest and possibly tempers. That is not what this forum is about, and if you ever have a problem with someone, either have the guts to talk it out with them and resolve it in private, or if you are uncomfortable doing that, contact me. I will hold you in confidence and we can work together to resolve things. Posts like this are unwelcome and please be advised if they occur in the future I may feel obligated to delete them.
Thanks all, you’re a great group!! 🙂
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