Sister drama. I need help!

[Katherine]

Helped sister by having her move here temperarily. I need to kick her out?
She does not pay any bills, no names on rent/lease. She gets some mail sent here. In fact, she is gone about 3 weeks out of the four (staggard,) She was told to move out on July 1st, but it got pushed back to the 31st. I am moving her stuff to the dining room, it is sheltered, not being put near any trash, her things are being taken care of, I am not being reckless. Yet, she is threatening legal action…saying my handling of her stuff is illegal, and I have to give her 30 day notice. Does she have a foot to stand on?

We live in Des Moines, IA

[Rachel]

Oy. I highly doubt she’s got any legal room to threaten you, but I would recommend getting some direct legal advice from an attorney. A brief consultation should cost you little to nothing. Have all the pertinent facts together before consultation to get the most out of it: reason for moving in, when moved in, what bills were/were not paid and when/how long, how much of the space is common/shared and how much is private, whether or not you have a contract with each other, whether or not you own or rent the property, if rented, whether or not her name is also on the lease, etc. Also, record any issues: unpaid bills, drug/alcohol use, threats (physical, legal, or otherwise), etc., being careful to note time/date/circumstances.

Call a reputable firm or attorney, and not necessarily the cheapest one. I’d recommend the firm I work for, but I’m not certain that this is the Des Moines office’s legal expertise.

Good luck, and next time you’ll know better than to help her out in this way.

[Hannah]

As far as I know, if she does not pay any rent or bills and is not on the lease, she is a GUEST in your home, and you could put her belongings on the side of the road and she wouldn’t be able to pursue any legal action.

I’m sorry that you’re having such trouble with your sister.. it sounds like a situation in which she is taking advantage of you and is being incredibly ungrateful to boot..

Edit: as far as the 30 day notice thing.. I kind of laughed. Once again, she is a guest in your home. You don’t need to give her ANY notice to ask her to leave. If you were to call the police and explain the situation, they would ask you if you would like HER escorted out of the house. Also, didn’t you already have an agreement of July 1? That sounds like a notice to me!

Edit #2: I have found a page that seems to side with your sister, believe it or not (I’m a bit appaled):

http://smallbusiness.yahoo.com/r-answers-a-20110303140415AAdurl6-k-their+friends

It basically says that if the person lives in your rented home for more than 30 days, that they are considered a tenant and the only person that can evict them is the landlord. If you are on good terms with your landlord, maybe you can explain the situation to them and have them kick her out?

Edit #3: (lol) I found yet another page that sides with YOU:

http://www.justanswer.com/law/0ys1o-kick-someone-house.html

So.. I guess in short ghostndragon’s right – to be on the safe side, contact a lawyer and see what they say.

Commission spots are currently closed! Please message me for details.
Please visit My Webpage to see my art and PYO's that I've done in the past!

[Katherine]

Hannah, it is a house, and my name, and my husband’s name is on the loan agreemenbt. So am I the “landlord” then? Thanks, I am waiting to hear back from a lawyer. I will never help her again.
She is arguing that because she gets mail here, that she is considered a legal tenant, but someone named Dixie Crook has been getting mail here for years…so I do not see that as proof. What is stupid, is I am painted as the bad guy.

[Hannah]

Well if it’s a house then I’m pretty sure (from what I’ve read and not from legal expertise) that you can legally kick her out. When I was looking around I saw someone else mention that “getting mail” thing, but it was also bundled with the person living there for some amount of time and the fact that they were renting. I hope this all gets decided in your favor!

And you’re definitely not the bad guy here 🙂

Commission spots are currently closed! Please message me for details.
Please visit My Webpage to see my art and PYO's that I've done in the past!

[Danzig Moon (Karen)]

Hannah is right her name appears on nothing that would even remotley give her a foot to stand on.
That does not make you the bad person in this but does say alot about your sister.
I’ve got a brother that is just the same way.

*** Always looking for Brindles..*** AWD Pieces **** Lavender Coiled Mother with Globe**** if you have one you would like to sell or trade please contact me ?

[Katherine]

Wow, thank you so much! I called a couple lawers (no luck talking to them-too busy) but i did call a number (that my smart-ass sister gave to me thinking she would be right) and it turns out i can give her a three day to quit notice. I made sure to ask about the mail, paying no bills, etc..and I don’t have to give her 30 days. HAHAHAHA!!! She is now swearing up a storm at me (through texts, and is ticked off. Now, i need to see what I have a right to to if she does not give me a way to give her the notice. Wow. I do not need her in my life. I bent over backwards to help her, by moving her in my TINY house, and she treated me with disrespect the entire time!! Wow, I sure HATE drama!

SecretHope, i am so sad you have a brother like that. 🙁 So sad…thanks for yur help!

[Hannah]

I am so glad to hear the good news!!

Now, i need to see what I have a right to to if she does not give me a way to give her the notice.

Well since according to your sister, she gets mail at your house now – cant you just mail it to her?
XD

Poetic justice?

Commission spots are currently closed! Please message me for details.
Please visit My Webpage to see my art and PYO's that I've done in the past!

[Kachina]

Ugh, I feel your pain. My brother is the same way. So when he called up a couple years ago wanting to “visit” I told him that sure we had room for him. In the birds’ room of course, where he’d be awoken every morning by a screaming amazon. (He’s a druggie, and loves to be up all night then sleep in) 😀 How quickly he went from wanting to visit, to not being sure his car would make it. Once he learned that the well has dried up as far as ol’ sis goes, he quit calling here. A bit painful, but I’m thinking it’s for the best. fwiw, he threatened to hurt my handicapped hubby after the above incident. Takes a big man to threaten someone with cerebral palsy.. >.> I think he forgets sometimes that I used to be a police officer and will protect that which I hold dear.

But I ramble..

If you think she’s going to give you grief when it comes time to give her notice, involve the local police. I know you’re not looking for more drama, but at least if they’re present when you’re trying to give her notice and she flakes or whatever she ultimately decides to do, you have undeniable proof that you did in fact try to serve her but she was being difficult. She won’t be able to come back on you at all.

Good luck!

[Rachel]

I am so glad to hear the good news!!

Now, i need to see what I have a right to to if she does not give me a way to give her the notice.

Well since according to your sister, she gets mail at your house now – cant you just mail it to her?
XD

Poetic justice?

Actually, yeah. Mail the notice. If d she doesn’t get it because she doesn’t pick up her mail, it’s her bad not yours. Keep a copy of it for your records. Although, if you told her to move out on the 1st, today is the 5th, you’ve given her more than 3 days.

[Rachel]

She is arguing that because she gets mail here, that she is considered a legal tenant, but someone named Dixie Crook has been getting mail here for years…so I do not see that as proof.

Dixie Crook sounds like a good nickname… 😉

[littleironhorse]

What an awful situation! You seem to have gotten very useful advice here, so I hope it gets resolved quickly.

Too bad we can’t choose our family.

[Katherine]

I am so glad to hear the good news!!

Now, i need to see what I have a right to to if she does not give me a way to give her the notice.

Well since according to your sister, she gets mail at your house now – cant you just mail it to her?
XD

Poetic justice?

Haha!! You know, that did cross my mind!! 😛 Could I really get away with it! BWAHA!

She is arguing that because she gets mail here, that she is considered a legal tenant, but someone named Dixie Crook has been getting mail here for years…so I do not see that as proof.

Dixie Crook sounds like a good nickname… 😉

Yeah, I never thought of it just being a moniker…lol

Kachina, some people are just so inconsiderate, and stupid. Unfortunately, you have your brother…I am sorry he was/is like that!!

And thank you all for your advice and kind words. After I revealed to her what was legally her 3 day rights, she spent (I am not kidding you) an additional 4 or 5 hours insulting me, my friends, saying I had no real friends, insulting my marriage, wishing I could die lonely and miserable. So yeah, I am happy to say i did not insult her back, but I told her to grow up, be more mature, and I did stand up for the insults she so falsly tried to spew at me. I didn’t even cuss…I was that good, when i shouldn’t have been! I eventually told her I would do her a favor and quit responding, and she tried countless times to rile me up again. My blood pressure was so high, ande I couldn’t see straight. This whole thing started at 7am, and ended at 4 -5pm. Wow, I am so glad it is over! (Well, now I just need to wait for her to get her stuff out…and You know what is silly…she brought on that whole “I have 30 days, I know my RIGHTS” crap, and I just loved how I schooled her with that. tee hee. I really don’t plan on enforcing it, i am sure she will get her stuff, but it is nice to know that if i really have to, it will only take three days, and then I can legally go through the process of how to handle it.)
I have never been so disrespected as I have with her, and she is so irrational, nothing will get through to her. It is truly a shame we can’t pick our family members, but then again, we have to be grateful for the ones we do have.

[Kujacker]

Don’t worry, she’ll get hers soon enough.
You did right to stop responding to her. Now if you didn’t respond at all, that would have been better. Would have been a slap in her face for her to see that you’re unaffected by her behavior.
“insulting me, my friends, saying I had no real friends, insulting my marriage, wishing I could die lonely and miserable”? 😐 Who says that to family? Well, regardless. I feel anyone that hangs out with such a person is just as terrible. So really, her behavior is an insult to HER “friends” (do people that behave like this even have “real friends”?). I feel she’s actually envious of you and as such, must insult everything YOU have but she doesn’t. Thinking of it that way feels kind of good, huh? 🙂

What happens when the three days come and go and she hasn’t gotten her stuff? Are you legally allowed to dump it on the street?
And PLEASE. DO enforce it! If you don’t, she’ll take even more advantage of you.

[Rachel]

What happens when the three days come and go and she hasn’t gotten her stuff? Are you legally allowed to dump it on the street?
And PLEASE. DO enforce it! If you don’t, she’ll take even more advantage of you.

Yes, DO enforce it. You may lose certain legal rights if you make official notice and fail to enforce it. Not only will SHE think “well, she doesn’t really mean it,” the law may find that to be the actual case.

[Author]

Posts