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My thoughts were on par with Pheonix or siberakh1! lol, or you could give the Wii to someone else, and when he gets mad at you, say, “well, it was mine right? I knew someone who would have more time to use it than me. It was such a wonderful gift honey, but I really don’t have the time.” XD
eaglefeather831 wrote:My thoughts were on par with Pheonix or siberakh1! lol, or you could give the Wii to someone else, and when he gets mad at you, say, “well, it was mine right? I knew someone who would have more time to use it than me. It was such a wonderful gift honey, but I really don’t have the time.” XD
Well, I was referring to re-gifting it back to him actually, since he appears to have bought it for himself. 😉
Phoenix’s idea is the best. The diamond earrings will be a gift for him, because you’ll wear them and look even prettier, just for him.
Seriously, do that. 😆😆 Some devious minds on this forum….I love it!
Hopefully, you will be able to talk to him about the situation w/o it becoming a full blown storm. It’s terrible to have a crappy holiday. 🙁
We handle Christmas, B-days, etc. all the same. Make a list, send me a link….be specific. We may not be surprised, but we always get something we want. This year I got an emerald emperor and my husband got a fairing for his bike. He’s not going to be able to figure out which Windstones I “need” and no way can I pick out bike parts. Some will argue it’s not the most romantic system in the world, but it works for us. 😀
I have to say, my man only screwed up once in almost 20 years, so he’s got a good record! That one time it happened, I just said it and we went out together so I could pick something. Whatever he liked out of my choices, we got.
In your case, since it’s the second time, I dunno, girl! But the solutions given here are all good.
One thing: there’s nothing wrong with you/him buying your/his own gift; just be honest about it! I have had Warp10 do that: he’d come in and say, “Today, you bought me this for my birthday!”
But yeah, I can see a heated discussion coming on, no matter what you do, I think. Hugs!
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http://www.sarahjestin.com/feedbacklists.htmdragonmedley wrote:One thing: there’s nothing wrong with you/him buying your/his own gift; just be honest about it! I have had Warp10 do that: he’d come in and say, “Today, you bought me this for my birthday!”
Now that’s good straightforward communication! 😆
Maplecarver wrote:Phoenix wrote:So buy him a nice set of diamond earrings! 😀 Or what ever was on your list…
Hee hee! Or a quality bolt of cloth, or a Windstone… 😆
I haven’t recieved too many bad gifts. Usually I stash it away for a year or two till it irks me enough that I goodwill it. But one ugly-as-sin ceramic mask is now hanging by the chicken coop to scare away raccoons. So far, so good. 😆
I’d go for the diamond earrings he might take such a liking to the Windstone he would keep it for himself. Your also might put the (gift?) away that he gave you saying you want to save it for later. My b/f of 23 years is so romantic he has given me kitchen appliances, pressure washer, generator, new kitchen and bathroom cabinets, refrigerator, microwave and stove just to mention a few of the things for Christmas and birthdays over the past years. Oh and I almost forgot about the cordless drill. I might add he does try to give me things he thinks I need and will use
Well, for better or worse we had a discussion today (via IM, we are both at work) in regards to this and I told him that I truly feel it wasn’t just a gift for me. Went back and forth for a while with the conversation finally ending with the agreement to talk to our therapist (who we see on the 31st) about it. Fun.
Now I just have to figure out what the heck I want to do with the Wii. Either keep it and eventually get the yoga game I wanted when money gets a little more abundant or return it & get something else? I can’t win 100% either way.
*sigh*
I think if you keep it and get the yoga thing, you might not enjoy it as much, because of the history behind the Wii itself. I’d return it, get something else and get the Wii and yoga program you want at a later date, when this incident is a bit further in the past.
Read my books! Volume 1 and 2 of A Dragon Medley are available now.
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I host the feedback lists, which are maintained by drag0nfeathers.
http://www.sarahjestin.com/feedbacklists.htmGreater Basilisk wrote:dragonmedley wrote:One thing: there’s nothing wrong with you/him buying your/his own gift; just be honest about it! I have had Warp10 do that: he’d come in and say, “Today, you bought me this for my birthday!”
Now that’s good straightforward communication! 😆
Hey, my mom does it too with my dad, otherwise, she can hint all she wants, he just doesn’t get it!
Read my books! Volume 1 and 2 of A Dragon Medley are available now.
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I host the feedback lists, which are maintained by drag0nfeathers.
http://www.sarahjestin.com/feedbacklists.htmI have to admit that I think allowing this to become a source of contention is just too much. Taking it back because it will bring back hard feelings later suggests that you are allowing yourself to hang on to something that you really don’t need to. And add yet another source of hard feelings. The answer is to make the most out of it. Forgive him, but tell him that you really would only like the Wii for the yoga game and then tell him that you will be getting yourself the yoga game as your gift to him. If the gift he got you truly IS for him, this will balance it by making it a gift for you (with the yoga game) AND him. It shouldn’t be about getting back at him or getting mad at him. As I said before, sometimes boys are dumb. Not because they’re incapable of being sensitive, but because they just don’t understand what actions they should take to show YOU they’re sensitive. Sometimes they truly think that what makes them happy MUST make you happy because they’re happy with you. It’s a very frustrating misconception. But, what makes them worth while is when they learn from these sorts of things. And you do, too.
Well I’m still shaking my head here because I can’t understand why he didn’t use the Christmas list you went through the trouble of writing. 😕
If a Wii wasn’t on your list, then you obviously didn’t want it. The best thing for him to do is admit his mistake, return it, and get you something you DO want. Epecially if you are getting him things from his lists, right? It only makes sense to me! 🙂
Dragons4Life wrote:Well I’m still shaking my head here because I can’t understand why he didn’t use the Christmas list you went through the trouble of writing. 😕
If a Wii wasn’t on your list, then you obviously didn’t want it. The best thing for him to do is admit his mistake, return it, and get you something you DO want. Epecially if you are getting him things from his lists, right? It only makes sense to me! 🙂
I don’t get it either especially since he is the one that is so big on the present lists. Yep, I got him his big present from his list but did get him a few things that weren’t on his list too but only because he mentioned needing a few of them & then got several tshirts that i knew he would like (which he loved).
I do admit that I do put a whole lot of meaning into gifts; I do it when I give them & unfortunately look for it when getting them. Might make me a bad person for it but whatcanyado. :shrug:
I’m sorry to hear that happened, Crimson! *Hugs tight* I am certain you will both work through this. Little things like this can be pretty common in a relationship, but that doesn’t make it any easier to deal with! The best thing to do is forgive him, and let him know that you appreciate him. Explain to him without being confrontational how it hurt your feelings, but try not to attack him in your conversation. This will only make him recoil more and his defenses will go up immediately. But if you are soft and loving with the way you present it to him, he will be much more receptive as you explain the ways that it hurt you. I don’t know if you have taken this approach yet or not, but it’s worth a try. 🙂
Or you could buy him an SK for Christmas. 😀 j/k!
Im glad you two talked about it at least. It does kind of seem like he got it with the idea that he could have fun with it, too, but who knows? Guys can be silly sometimes. My first husband always gave me money, which seems very unthoughtful, but made sure I got what I liked. My 2nd hubby buys me diamonds… beautiful yes, but how often can I use them? Im in the Army. I suggest you get your Yoga game and have fun with it. I hope the counseling works if you guys go ahead and do it.
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