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Oh wow. Um, ok–so my stepdad Jeff calls, while we’re on the road back from dropping off maggie, a girl I used to babysit, who got to come for a visit this weekend. And he says there’s someone there who wants to talk to me. Asks me to guess. I’m totally clueless, and hate guessing games anyway, so he tells me. My SISTER!!!! I havent seen my sister for five years, because she lives with my mother, who is violent and abusive. I dont recall how many nights I spent worrying over my sister and brother, wondering if they were ok, and if my mother beat them and hurt them the way she did me.
So, we speed home, and I throw some stuff in a suitcase and haul butt to get there. I’m a nervous wreck the whole way, wishing it were a shorter drive. I get there and Jessica, my little sister, who I fed and cared for and changed her diapers when our mother was hardly ever home, she grew up. There she was, taller than me, and nearly full grown. She had run away, because our mother had been doing the same to her as had been done to me. She was so big! We’re nine years apart agewise, and she wont turn 18 til november. I had wondered and wondered, “do they ever think about me? are they ok? is she hurting them? if I had been smarter before disappearing from home, could I have gotten them out?” I could tell she was nervous about seeing me, til I grabbed her and squeezed her half to death while bawling. Oh god I cant describe what it was to finally see her again. We talked about a lot of things, she has some of the same emotional issues I have, and will always struggle with the “why” a mother can be so cold, hateful and cruel.
Jeff has all the legal stuff working out. There’s a hearing on the 19th of march, and I’ll have to be there. It will decide custody, and of course my mother is trying to charge Jessica with a boatload of charges which are nonexistent, we’re not worried about those. But I’m terrified to see my mother again. I’ve been terrified for years that I would run into her somewhere or something. Just thinking about it makes me want to throw up. I WILL do this for Jessica. I’ll be damned if I let her be put back into that house to be hurt again. I know that there will be people there and she wont be able to hurt me, but there’s a deeper fear, just of being in the room with her. Send me thoughts of strength, I’m going to need it.Oh Purplecat, this is so great to be with your sister after so long!
Seeing your mom will be tough, but remember, chances are, you can avoid her outside the court. What about your brother? Is he younger too? Will he be part of the custody stuff?
Sending you huge hugs and wishing you the best!
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http://www.sarahjestin.com/feedbacklists.htmJust hearing about your reunion bring tears to my eyes. I am so happy she got out and that you are going to be able to get her away from your mother. Where is she going to live, with you or your StepDad?
I hope you can also get your brother out eventually as well. I know the prospect of seeing your mother again is scary, but you are an adult now and she can’t touch you. just bring support with you, stand your ground and do what you need to to make sure Jessica won’t ever have to go back.
Considering her age, the judge isn’t likely to even consider it, especially in light of the abuse in addition.
Kyrin
My brother wont be able to be gotten out til he says he wants to be elsewhere or runs away. Which is so much easier said than done. I know from experience it’s terrifying to run away, not knowing if the system will put bring you back, to a situation made even worse. They did me, even though I had scalp ripped off, a concussion and a black eye. They just said my mother needed counseling. 😕
I don’t understand. How can TV make it seem like a parent only has to threaten a child and they are taken out of the home, but you and your siblings had physical evidence and you were left there!
*hugs*
Good Luck with the court proceedings. I’m sure we’d all be there in person, if we could, to support you. Your momma wouldn’t get past us! We may not be able to be there physically, but our thoughts are always with you. 🙂
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Click us to help us grow!Please let us know how everything goes. I’m glad you get to see your sister after such a long time.
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thank you so much, I’ll rest easier when I know she doesnt have to go back, and hopefully we can get my brother out too.
that story brought tears to my eyes! it’s Great that you got to see your sister!!! I’m very glad you are going to get her out of there and I hope you can get your brother out too! good luck!!! *hugs* I understand why your scared to see your mother again, I’d be terrified! let us know how everything goes! *hugs*
Jeepers, purplecat! 😯 What you and your sibs have been through–I don’t know where to start, but I’m furious with your mom. And with the bloody fools who sent you back into that mess with the injuries that you described: inexcusable! 👿 You and Jessica are incredibly brave and resourceful to have gotten away from that unspeakable situation.
I would for sure not let that woman get a hold of your contact information, because that can only lead to problems. Is there any way of protecting that information from her? You’re an adult now; surely she can’t play the “oh pity me, poor abandoned mother” card (poor abandoned rabid badger is more like it), but be careful. Other than that, seeing her in the courtroom will be rough, but if she’s fool enough to do or say anything bad there then she’ll only hurt herself. I’d be far, far more leery of any “reconciliatory” gestures she might make: they’d be poison. Jessica’s experiences prove that the leopard has not changed her spots. 👿
Good luck, and hang in there!
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