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Sooo, for any one who feels like answering I need some advice.
O.k. So have this friend whome I have liked for a long time. He is really sweet, kinda cute and basically the perfect guy. So I don’t get to see him very often cause we both have conflicting schedules, but the last time I saw him was a couple of months ago, he came over to see my new appartment. I finally told him that I like(d) him, and he seem to take it fine. So ya great right? Not quite.
The problem is I don’t think he likes me that way, but we were still good friends, and talked on the phone and stuff. Until like two months ago. You see I have post-concussive issue and one night wasn’t doing well. I’ll get blackouts sometimes, and very rarely I’ll get woozy and do stupid stuff. (I swear I was not drinking! and I never plan to.) But anyways, I wasn’t feeling well, and kind of half attetily sent him a text pretty much asking if her liked me the way i liked him and if he would go out with me.
I havn’t heard from him since. I texted him the next week to apologize about it when I found out I had done that. (my other friend informed me i had left a wierd message on her phone agian like last year in june when i had a major blackout. I felt really embarressed but I really just confused why I can’t get a hold of him. I’ve alwayd had to leave a message or two but he has usally tried to get back to me.
And here is where it gets tricky.. Next week he’s getting his braces off at the dentist. After that he will be exploring the area for a few weeks, and then he’s moving back to Colorado. (i think, he said his plans might change but i havn’t heard from him so ya) He told me last time I talked to him that he be busy this summer but that he would get back to me before he left. That was before I sent the text to him. So I guess what do I do? I’ve never been, on a date, and he is the only guy friend i have ever gotten along with. Even if I can’t date him, I still don’t want to lose a good friendship…
I know sad cosidering I’m 20 and have never had any luck. I’ve had a lot of guys run after me, but none who would like me for, well i guess me. And I sure aint ready for a kid, believe me!
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Always open for pyo commissions, repairs and fine artwork! Email me for current prices! awier(@)weaselsoneasels.comI’m 30 now and didn’t even have what I considered a real boyfriend until I was like 21. I’ve dated a few different guys in the last few years but even now I’m still not feeling ready to settle down and am still trying to meet new guys. Sometimes guys can back off a bit or get a bit scared off if they think you are just friends and then try to pursue them. I rarely pursue guys but I met one on facebook who was a friend of a friend and I loved everything about his profile and what he was into and I normally would not ask a guy out ever but I thought what the heck and I messaged him and put my interest out there and even asked if he wanted to meet up and thought I made it sound casual. It took him days to get back and when he did, he didn’t mention anything about getting together anytime soon but said maybe in the future he might see me at an event or something when he wasn’t so busy with work. I never did hear back from him about meeting so he clearly got scared off and I just felt stupid.
The lesson I learned is if a guy really likes you, sometimes you have to let him realize that and pursue you. If you already have a friendship, if I were you I would just act like your previous message was no big deal and just say ignore your other message and that you’re still interested in being just friends and seeing him or hanging out before he moves and if he wants to see you or stay in touch, he will. If not then unfortunately you will probably have to let him be and hope the next guy you meet appreciates you more and pursues you. There are lots of great guys out there and although it’s tough if you like someone, you have to keep in mind when one door closes another always opens but you won’t see the open door if you keep looking back at the closed one. I hope that helps somewhat.
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Sweetie,in my opinion…you have a lot of time to find the right guy if this one doesn’t go like you want it to.You are very young and there are many,many guys out there.You are wise to wait to start thinking of a serious boyfriend. Good for you.The more mature you are,the better choices you will make.There are a lot of bad out there so stay smart.As for him,well,I am sure he has his reasons.One might be because he knew he is moving to Colorado..Long distance relationships are hard and especially hard on young people.There is so much life to live.I think that in order to have a long loving relationship you have to,MUST,be friends before it progresses to something more.Affairs of the heart are tough and we only learn through our own experiences.My Jeff and I were friends for 10yrs,work mates too,before we got together and it is the best relationship I have ever had.When you are friends first,you truly learn the person’s ways,not the fronts humans put on in the game of love.Be patient and love will come.Maybe not in the relationship you are looking for in this young man but then again,you never know.Time tells all tales.Trust yourself and your instincts about men,they will do you right if you listen.Some guys are better as just friends,some leave alone and hit the curb with them the first time they insult you or make you cry.Trust me.Respect first,friendship,be you, and honesty and you will find your mate.Good luck with it all.Be friends with your young man.He may feel the same as you but too much going on in his life for a relationship at the moment.Never know what the future brings. 😉
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Always open for pyo commissions, repairs and fine artwork! Email me for current prices! awier(@)weaselsoneasels.comYea, I’m 31 and have only had 4 relationships in total so you have lots of time. I had something similar in highschool where I was really good friends with someone for about 4 years and then as soon as he found out I had feelings for him he completely ignored me and never talked to me again. I didn’t even appriach him on it, a friend of a friend witha big mouth told him about it because Ihad planned to take it to the grave… anyway.. I know that’s not what you wanted to hear, but the point I’m trying to make is I did get over it and moved on to greener pastures… several times since! LOL! So no worries, you have tons of time ^_^ If he is a real friend, he will be able to look past that and understand your apology and that you at least want to be friend still even if he doesn’t have “those” kinds of feelings. It might een be that he does, but he’s not ready to admit it to himself so you just never know. Guys are weird.
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Dreamscape, Orion, Poison Dart, Fireberry, Spangler + Tigerberry DragonsI wouldn’t worry too much about it. And don’t feel bad for not having a boyfriend yet. I didn’t get mine until about 6 months ago (and I’m 22 now). You just have to wait for the right person. If this guy was right for you he wouldn’t be ignoring you now. Don’t stress. You have LOTS of time.
As far as not wanting to lose the friendship, at this point I think all you can do is wait and see if he contacts you again. I’d give it 6 months to a year, and if he still hasn’t messaged you after that, just forget it. It’s not worth the stress/heartache.
Anyway, I wish you luck, hon. Everything will work out in the end.
Just like everyone else has said, I wouldn’t worry about it! I can’t give any advice on the relationship front because I, like you, have never had a boyfriend but I can chip in my two cents that I’m 23 and I’ve never had one. I don’t really expect to have one for a couple of years at least; a dude would be too much stress for me right now and I think sometimes you really have to wait a really long time for Mr. Right to come along anyway. For me personally I may never have a boyfriend or even a male friend period but that doesn’t mean that there is anything wrong with me or with anyone else. We just gotta be patient and wait and see what happens. 🙂 I’m sure you’ll have meet your Prince Charming someday soon but ‘soon’ may be anywhere between tomorrow and a decade away. 😉
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Excellent!
I know what it feels like to “know” there are many other guys out there, many fish in the sea so to speak, but to “want” that ONE guy. My first love was like that, and he absolutely didn’t return the emotion, even in the wanting to be friends part, and I did some seriously stupid things before I found that out. I eventually got over that and moved on, but learned some valuable lessons in the process. I like to think I’ve always been lucky in love in that every relationship that I’ve had I’ve been able to learn a bit more about what I wanted, and what I didn’t want in a future husband. Each time I grew until I met my now husband, Jarrod.
I guess what I’m saying is hold out for what you really want, and for that someone that knows what they really want, and what they want is you. If you don’t know what you want, get as much experience as you can before making any final decisions!
Keep your chin up, believe in yourself and things will happen for you!
Guys are weird.
Bwahahaha! I think that sums it up well for some of the male gender out there.
I would wait for him to get his head around it. I have a friend who was stressing over the fact that she was single and while the guy she’s with is really nice and awesome, I get the feeling she “settled” for him; they’re not particularly a good match on a few different levels. So, really, don’t sweat it.
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