Home › Forums › Miscellany › Community › R.I.P. My Calvin 2001-2008
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December 28, 2008 at 7:11 am #747746
Im so very sorry.
December 28, 2008 at 11:15 am #747747I am so sorry too! Cats are such special pets, nothing can replace them so we don’t try, we just move on to the next loving little furry purry one that needs us and that brings us joy and companionship and unconditional love. Of course you will grieve your special Calvin for quite a while and the new kitty won’t replace him, just bring you the joy of kittydom in its own way. And Calvin would want that because that’s one of the things he was here to teach you about, don’t you think? I still miss my 5 lbs 19 year old Scardycat who left for kittyheaven 4 years ago following the death of Poosygato also 19 by a year. 😥 Due to circumstances I haven’t gotten another cat but I get my kittyfix with the neighbor’s cat. I believe Calvin would love to pass the kittylove torch to the next kitty in your family! Also, I think your daughter is noticing your grief and trying to understand how to deal with that as well as deal with the loss of Calvin, so it’s also important to help her understand that when people lose what they care a lot for, they cry and feel really sad and that this isn’t about her or anything she can fix and it’s ok for her to feel sad about Calvin too and it won’t make you feel any more sad than you do, she doesn’t have to make you feel better or do anything about the sadness. It also helps sometimes to have her draw what is happening, so she can express herself in pictures if she has trouble with the feelings in words. Sometimes kids identify with the animal so they think maybe this is what would happen if I died too, othertimes they have no real conception of death, they think it’s like on TV where the same actor shows up again in another episode, not dead at all, so there is no “foreverness” about it. So maybe just spending a little “open” time with her to see what is going on in her mind and what she is thinking/feeling would give you a clue to her reaction. These are just some suggestions, take what seems useful, dump the rest.
My deepest sympathies on the loss of Calvin!December 28, 2008 at 3:51 pm #747748I am so sorry. 🙁
December 28, 2008 at 8:07 pm #747749Condolences from NJ–we know all too well what it’s like to lose a pet close to the holidays. We lost one of our Dalmatians 2 days after Christmas 10 years ago, so the holidays are always bitterweet. 🙁
I have to agree with those who say getting a new kitty is the right thing to do. The best cure for loss of a pet is puppy/kitten breath. Maybe there is a kitty in dire need of a new home, just waiting for you to come to the rescue!
{{{hugs from NJ}}}December 28, 2008 at 10:28 pm #747750I’m so sorry to hear about your cat. He looked like he was a handsome one too.
December 29, 2008 at 12:04 am #747751😥
December 29, 2008 at 12:29 am #747752Tonight Calvin was laid to rest behind our house, in trees where he can watch the little birds. Jim(hubby) met the vet and his wife early this evening to get the body. They were very nice to him and told him that losing Calvin ruined their xmas too.
We didn’t say any words or gather at his grave, infact, the kids and I were not home. They have been doing alright and I didn’t want to bring back any sadness. Noah is ok, tho he gets sad if we talk about it. Natalie still hasn’t said anything, but she has been terribly clingy, which I’m sure is her way of coping. She and Calvin were 2 peas in a pod and I’m sure she must be feeling the loss keenly.
Jim doesn’t want to get another cat. He says it just starts the cycle all over again. My guess is that I’ll take the kids to the humane society and see if there are any matches. I’d like to try to find a cat that clicks with Nattie to help her thru.
Thanks again to everyone. It does help to talk about it.
December 29, 2008 at 12:41 am #747753Very sorry to hear of your loss–such awful timing and so sudden, too. 🙁
My condolensces to you, your family, and your vet as well.
December 29, 2008 at 12:28 pm #747754I’m so sorry to hear that, asinnamon. *hugs* 😥
December 29, 2008 at 8:41 pm #747755Hugs, hugs, hugs!!! I’m so sorry… When our Abby-cat passed we waited a little while before we got Pixel and Loki. Even if getting another kitty is starting the whole cycle all over again I’d still do it in a heart beat. You aren’t replacing your furry kid-let, you’re just adding another member to the family; and if it helps to have Nattie help in choosing then I’d recommend it. Hang tough, we’re here for ya!
twindragonsmum
tdm
December 30, 2008 at 9:20 pm #747756I’m sorry for your loss. When the time is right for a new member of the family, you’ll know. Let your daughter lead you as to the best way to help her through it. She will give you hints along the way to guide you.
Sending Blessings to you and your family.
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