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dragonessjade wrote:
Thanks Mimi. I will try to remember these when she does it again. Sometimes it is sooo hurtful that I don’t tend to think that fast.
You’re welcome. I know what you mean, its difficult to deal with nasty people like this. I had to deal with this co-worker a few years ago who was really annoying. He actually had the nerve to barge into my office without asking permission and take a pen from my desk (this was when I was sitting in my office working). I was so surprised the when this happened that I didn’t say anything, but I decided to put all of my pens (except the one I was using) in one of my desk drawers to prevent this from happening again. Would you believe it — about a week later he barged into my office again and without asking permission, went past me, opened my desk drawer, took a pen out, and left. Again, I was so shocked that I didn’t react quickly enough to say anything. But the next time he tried this a few days later, I said to him in a very cold voice, “What do you think you’re doing?” and then he mumbled something about needing a pen. I told him that I didn’t want him to ever go into my desk again without permission, and that my desk was not the office supply. He got embarrassed and slunk out, and didn’t ever try to do it again.
So what I’m trying to say is that this person might have gotten away with this behavior in the past, but now that you’re mentally prepared, you have a very good chance of being able to give the correct response the next time she tries something. Its actually a good idea to rehearse what you’re going to say ahead of time for particular situations that you’ve encountered with her in the past, then you have a much better chance of reflexively giving the correct response when the situation arises. That’s actually what I did for the case that I told you about. I also thought through what I would say if he decided to get nasty (I would’ve told him that he did ever did this again I would report him to HR for harassing me). I have a very non-confrontational personality, and it takes a conscious effort for me to behave in a confrontational way. So for me, it really helped to think everything through ahead of time.
Ski and others have given different approaches to dealing with this, but I think the common thread is that if you show her that you won’t take any crap she’ll leave you alone afterwards. You just have to pick the approach that works best for you. I hope you’re able to get her to stop bugging you.
skigod377 wrote:Yeah… and if that doesnt work, THEN kick her a$$.
ROFLMAO That’s my girl Ski! Gotta love the millitial mentality!
I agree with Dragon Master’s approach on this one, Mimi’s is good too- Ski’s approach may get you in an HR issue of “Hostile working environment” and you may be perceived as “threatening” which is not something you want- imagine having to cover your a$$ every time you did or said anything in case someone filed a complaint about your behavior. You don’t want that but definitely drag her arse to the person she’s gossiping about and tell the person what she just said.
I would hope that if she gets caught and stopped in her tracks a few times the novelty will wear off and at the same time everyone else will learn what sort of person she really is
CherylKaufman wrote:Ski’s approach may get you in an HR issue of “Hostile working environment” and you may be perceived as “threatening” which is not something you want- imagine having to cover your a$$ every time you did or said anything in case someone filed a complaint about your behavior.
That’s very good point! Definitely better to err on the side of caution.
Romeodanny wrote:I just do the ignore them and hopefully they’ll go away. Works most of the time. Of course I’m in a locked room by myself 99% of the time. I get to deal with bullys on the phone more often. (Most of the people at head office treat the people that work in the stores really badly)
I don’t get alot of people like you have to deal with. I get the more annoying kind of sneaky people. Like one day I put my pen down, turned from the desk for one second, turned back around and my pen was gone. Of course a week later it showed up at the checkouts, but oh it’s the cashiers pen not mine. 🙄 right.
The worst are the people who break equiptment like PDT’s, rascals, radios, printers, etc, and don’t own up to it. It seems like we have to call for service (IBM, ADT, Rioche…) almost everyday. I also get the pleasure of adjusting item counts for “known theft” where we find the discarded package. People throw all sorts of junk in that bin. I’ve had everything from broken glass to butchers knives. To open packages that only need to be patched up and discounted. I feel like such a mother. I’m always cleaning up after somebody.
I am glad you don’t have to deal with ppl like her. Although the people you deal with would make me very frusterated. When I was switching with my co-worker every other week then I would feel like Cinderella. I had to clean up a lot more after people then I do now.Dragon Master wrote:I would keep bringing the person talked about directly to the person doing the talking EVERY TIME it happens eventually the game will be over and she will stop. I would also confront her with things like we DO NOT have to tell the entire office when WE get food, and when asked why you do not eat at your own desk ask her what difference it makes to her where you eat. Eventually she will see that you are not going to take any crap from her and hoepfully she will stop. I woudl also ask her if her arms and legs where broken when asking you to get paper for any printer.
Ig you have ever seen Florence on the Jefferson’s THAT is how you should handle things.
Yes, I will take it into consideration. I haven’t seen Florence on the Jeffersons. Is that a comedy movie?mimitrek wrote:dragonessjade wrote:Thanks Mimi. I will try to remember these when she does it again. Sometimes it is sooo hurtful that I don’t tend to think that fast.
You’re welcome. I know what you mean, its difficult to deal with nasty people like this. I had to deal with this co-worker a few years ago who was really annoying. He actually had the nerve to barge into my office without asking permission and take a pen from my desk (this was when I was sitting in my office working). I was so surprised the when this happened that I didn’t say anything, but I decided to put all of my pens (except the one I was using) in one of my desk drawers to prevent this from happening again. Would you believe it — about a week later he barged into my office again and without asking permission, went past me, opened my desk drawer, took a pen out, and left. Again, I was so shocked that I didn’t react quickly enough to say anything. But the next time he tried this a few days later, I said to him in a very cold voice, “What do you think you’re doing?” and then he mumbled something about needing a pen. I told him that I didn’t want him to ever go into my desk again without permission, and that my desk was not the office supply. He got embarrassed and slunk out, and didn’t ever try to do it again.
So what I’m trying to say is that this person might have gotten away with this behavior in the past, but now that you’re mentally prepared, you have a very good chance of being able to give the correct response the next time she tries something. Its actually a good idea to rehearse what you’re going to say ahead of time for particular situations that you’ve encountered with her in the past, then you have a much better chance of reflexively giving the correct response when the situation arises. That’s actually what I did for the case that I told you about. I also thought through what I would say if he decided to get nasty (I would’ve told him that he did ever did this again I would report him to HR for harassing me). I have a very non-confrontational personality, and it takes a conscious effort for me to behave in a confrontational way. So for me, it really helped to think everything through ahead of time.
Ski and others have given different approaches to dealing with this, but I think the common thread is that if you show her that you won’t take any crap she’ll leave you alone afterwards. You just have to pick the approach that works best for you. I hope you’re able to get her to stop bugging you.
Yes, I think I will have to practice more of what I am going to say. 😀CherylKaufman wrote:I agree with Dragon Master’s approach on this one, Mimi’s is good too- Ski’s approach may get you in an HR issue of “Hostile working environment” and you may be perceived as “threatening” which is not something you want- imagine having to cover your a$$ every time you did or said anything in case someone filed a complaint about your behavior. You don’t want that but definitely drag her arse to the person she’s gossiping about and tell the person what she just said.
lol Ski. I will just fly you down here so you can do that.
Yes, I agree more with the cautious approch cause I know she will file a complaint or sue for harrasment. I want her to stop, but I don’t want to get in trouble. Thanks guys. 😀 Your great.dragonessjade wrote:Dragon Master wrote:I would keep bringing the person talked about directly to the person doing the talking EVERY TIME it happens eventually the game will be over and she will stop. I would also confront her with things like we DO NOT have to tell the entire office when WE get food, and when asked why you do not eat at your own desk ask her what difference it makes to her where you eat. Eventually she will see that you are not going to take any crap from her and hoepfully she will stop. I woudl also ask her if her arms and legs where broken when asking you to get paper for any printer.
Ig you have ever seen Florence on the Jefferson’s THAT is how you should handle things.
Yes, I will take it into consideration. I haven’t seen Florence on the Jeffersons. Is that a comedy movie?It’s an old TV show. In fact, I think it was a spin-off of All in the Family that we talked about before. Florence was the maid and she lipped off every chance she got. Most of the time she watched TV and ate the Jeffersons’ food.
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