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Congrats on the new dog! It sounds like he’s settling in pretty well. From what you’ve described of his background, he’s lucky to be out of that situation, and he doesn’t seem as messed up by it as some dogs would have been.
You sound like you’re starting him out very well, and I don’t want you to think that I’m poking at your methods. But you did say that this is your first dog. And the funny thing about dogs is that they’re happiest when they know what the boundaries are, who ranks whom in the family, and what their role is. That’s safety to a dog, knowing these things. And a dog would always rather have somebody “in charge” to tell them what to do in a scary situation, especially a dog who’s had some rough times in his life. So it’s great that you’re already giving him guidelines and telling him what is OK and what isn’t. He wants to know what will please you; he wants to be a good dog.
Now that said, I wanted to let you know the other funny thing about doggy psychology. Shadow’s new to the home, and for the first two weeks he’s going to be on his very best behavior while he tries to figure out where the boundaries are. After that, he’s going to start testing them. Probably gently, but he will test them. He might try getting onto your bed more, or he might actually take food that’s not being watched carefully enough. What he’s doing is trying to find out how strong the house rules are. He’s not forgetting, and he’s not trying to tell you that he’s unhappy. He is simply driven by dog nature to push against the boundaries you set, for a time, in order to determine if they really are The Rules.
The really important thing is that you just keep reinforcing the rules. Don’t let him push a rule aside: if he does, he’ll only challenge the other rules even harder. Show him through repetition that the house rules are rock-solid, no special exceptions. No dogs on the bed. No dogs taking people food. It’s OK if you choose to give him a treat, but not when he’s begging for it (sitting in front of you and staring at your food is very bad manners in dog terms). Once he sees that the rules really are solid and enforced by you and your husband, he’ll stop pushing. This whole process, while annoying to many new dog owners, happens with every dog to varying degrees. Your holding your ground and not letting him push you around will actually help him to settle in faster and become a better part of your family.
Hopefully Shadow will be a dog who doesn’t push very hard, and accepts his boundaries gracefully. (I have a ten-year-old border collie. He’s a wonderful dog, but he pushes us every day in some manner or another. Give him an inch and he’ll take a mile, so I don’t give him that inch.) Enjoy Shadow–he’s lucky to have you! 🙂
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