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April 11, 2008 at 12:32 am #688800
I got a permission slip yesterday in my son’s work folder. I read it and couldn’t beleive what I was reading. It is for a sexual abuse education program that is being given to the school, grades K-8. For the younger kids they are using puppets to teach and demonstrate. It goes on to say that they plan on role playing with the older kids, I think grades 5-8. They intend to talk about innapproriate touching, uncomfortable situations, who you should tell, why it feels like a secret, etc…
I’m really torn. My son is 6, very sensative but very open with his dad and I. I’m uncomfortable with people I don’t know presenting this information to him. I feel he is too young to have any ‘sex issues’ brought up, especailly by the school. On the other hand, I don’t want to make a big deal out of nothing, and if the rest of the kids in his first grade class will be seeing this, then maybe he should too. I dont know, I just feel like he is 6 years old and this stuff should be up to Jim and I to talk about with him when HE is ready….How do we make this decision?
April 11, 2008 at 12:32 am #495025April 11, 2008 at 12:37 am #688801IMO you hear way too often about nut wad pediophiles in the schools, churches and on the street. I believe the sooner they know what to look for and how to get outta a situation the better. Remember those preditors are sneaky they know just what to say to keep a kid quiet . The kids need to know not to listen to them and to tell right away. As far as being ready i will teach my daughter as soon as she understands and if the schools want to hel pout i am more than willing to sign her up for the class
April 11, 2008 at 12:39 am #688802I don’t have kids so, I can’t give advice. But, if you have questions or concerns then why not go to the teacher and discuss it? You are the parent and if you think he’s too young then you have the last word. But, it’s a very important thing to learn. I have a book (well had…. I’m not sure where it is) it was written for grade one to grade three. It was an excellent book (it was given to me in the parenting class I took in grade 12)
April 11, 2008 at 12:46 am #688803I’m gonna send in a note to the teacher tomorrow to have her call me. I guess part of what makes me so uncomfortable with it is the puppets, and that this info is going to given to my son by someone I don’t know. It creeps me out to think of some wierdo making puppets touch each others privates.
Don;t get me wrong, we have absolutely talked to the kids about what ‘privates’ are, why they are that way, that nobody should be touching them there and to tell us if someone makes them uncomfortable, etc…
That is a really good point about all the weirdos popping up in schools, churches, etc….
April 11, 2008 at 1:39 am #688804As a sexual abuse survivor I suggest you seriously consider teaching your child how to protect themselves from a “bad” touching scenerio. If you are really uncomfortable with the class lessons, ask if you can get a preview ahead of time, and also attend.
I think seeing how they are approaching this touchy (no pun intended) subject would be a good way to help you make your decision.
But as a victim, I wish I had been taught what to do. Perhaps it wouldn’t have gone on for 5 years. I did manage to make him stop without help though, something in me snapped and I finally got angry and made it very clear that if he kept it up, I would be screaming the house down and then he would get to explain to Mom what the hell he was doing in my room at 3am. (stepdad)
I still have some issues in my relationships, but mostly I am whole. But many others out there aren’t.
Also, age when the abuse began was 9, while 6 is still early, not all predators wait that long. The more your son knows, the better off he will be.
Kyrin
April 11, 2008 at 2:11 am #688805talk to him and educate him yourself, now…I’d feel kinda weird having a stranger teach my kid that too. But, I do think he needs to be taught, even when young, what is not ok and what to do if it happens. I also survived sexual abuse, and can say from experience that they pick the younger, more vulnerable children. I was 7.
April 11, 2008 at 3:17 am #688806Agreed with Purplecat. Talk to him about it first, yourself, so that when he hears the information in school, it won’t be such a shock to him.
Although I don’t have any kids of my own, I’d say 6 is too young to talk about ‘sex stuff’ also. But, as was already pointed out, I think it’s an unfortunate neccessity.
When I was a kid, in the early ’90s, they were always talking about ‘stay away from drugs’ and ‘stay away from strangers’ and what to do when a stranger tries to talk to you…it’s kind of the same thing, only with a ‘modern’ twist. 🙄 It’s a shame anyone should have to talk with their child about something so terrible.
On the other hand, something that we, as adults see as evil and corrupt, a child might not have the conscience yet, to realize that it feels bad or wrong. He (not just your son, but any young child) might also not be as bothered by it, since he knows nothing about anything sexual. In his mind, it might have the same severity as saying “Don’t talk to strangers, they could be dangerous” 😕
But I know you will make the right decision and do what’s best for you and your son 🙂
April 11, 2008 at 3:31 am #688807I am a Nurse Practitioner and 8 years of my initial practice was pediatric…I am in ENT now, but see a lot of kids.
There is no right or wrong about how parents raise their kids. You as a parent, must decide what is right and appropriate for your child, this may be based on your faith or personal convictions.
You must be comfortable with what your children are being taught and how they are taught.
With that said, young children, especially 3 years to 8 years should be taught that adults are not always right. That if an adult trys to touch them in an inappropriate way, they should run, tell, holler or scream.
The problem with very young kids, is they can not distinguish someone dangerous from a friend. They are easily swayed. That is where all the trouble comes in.
Pedophiles will tell the kids anything to assure their silence. It is so sad that we have to deal with this and it makes it hard to let children out of our sight.
My suggestion is that you browse the parenting books at the book store and find one that meshes with your ideals. Then you can use that technigue to help your children to try to stop the spread of the evil of pedophilia.
Good luck and if anyone has parenting questions or problem areas, I would be happy to assist.
April 11, 2008 at 6:07 am #688808I was 7 or 8 when I remember my school addressing that subject. I don’t recall exactly how they went about it though… I think they had a doll for anatomical reference, but no role-playing puppets (that’s creepy to me), and I think boys were separate from girls. But personally, I’d feel really weird about letting the school teach the kids about that without seeing their presentation first. *shrug* Like watching a movie to see if your young’un really should be watching it.
April 11, 2008 at 6:55 am #688809I don’t remember how my school addressed the topic. I do know why I don’t remember though – my mother had (my father passed away when I was little) made VERY sure I understood the biological facts. She’d taught me like it was just another lesson – colours of the rainbow, planets, body parts – and like being shoved or hit or otherwise bullied, it was made clear that Abuse Was Wrong, Tell About It.
The puppet show sounds creepy to me…
April 11, 2008 at 7:06 am #688810gosh thats a tough one…
I think you should say no to the school and tell him your self.. but thats me… 5 or 5 seems so young ;(
I am kinda anti public school though..This subject just is icky and depresses me ;(((
I hate when ppl take advantage of children… they should all be shot ;(April 11, 2008 at 7:47 am #688811Coming from another mother of a 6 year old, I would let him go. I wish they had that at my kids school. My husband and I have talked to him dozens of times about the subject and every time we go out we remind him. Even though we have talked to him and told him what to do, sometimes it is better for them to hear it from a teacher figure. Kids are kids and as much as we don’t want to admit it, they would love to listen to anyone but mon and dad! Like the others said, talk to the teacher and be there for the program. Thats just my 2 & 1/2 cents worth 😀
April 11, 2008 at 1:23 pm #688812asinnamon wrote:I got a permission slip yesterday in my son’s work folder. I read it and couldn’t beleive what I was reading. It is for a sexual abuse education program that is being given to the school, grades K-8. For the younger kids they are using puppets to teach and demonstrate. It goes on to say that they plan on role playing with the older kids, I think grades 5-8. They intend to talk about innapproriate touching, uncomfortable situations, who you should tell, why it feels like a secret, etc…
I’m really torn. My son is 6, very sensative but very open with his dad and I. I’m uncomfortable with people I don’t know presenting this information to him. I feel he is too young to have any ‘sex issues’ brought up, especailly by the school. On the other hand, I don’t want to make a big deal out of nothing, and if the rest of the kids in his first grade class will be seeing this, then maybe he should too. I dont know, I just feel like he is 6 years old and this stuff should be up to Jim and I to talk about with him when HE is ready….How do we make this decision?I understand your points, both of thinking he may be too young/sensitive, and not wanting others to teach your son about this stuff. I will tell you one thing, though. 6 is not too young for a sexual preditor.
April 11, 2008 at 2:17 pm #688813I agree with purplecat, you need to talk with him yourself first. But I think you should see if you can attend the session with him as well. The school is trying to cover the subject because of the frequency of this crime to younger children. Also many parents are reluctent to teach their children about this subject, often waiting untill some else has already educated them, weather that be to the good or bad. I thought it was great that you had already begun approaching this subject with him. 🙂
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