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Sorry I haven’t been around much guys. When I got back from Switzerland, I had maybe a day to relax and maybe a week to catch back up on sleep from the jetlag and then my family moved to another house, so we were finishing up packing. My old friend who is in the army was back in town, so I was spending time with him.
On May 22, my boyfriend, whom I really thought I was going to marry in the next two years (we’d talked about it, we’d agreed 2 years) whom I really thought was The One…he had every characheristic I am looking for in a husband…proved me wrong when he dumped me while I was over seas…and ruined the next handful of days afterwards. Pretty selfish that he didn’t/doesnt have the…um……guts……..to wait till I got home and do it to my face, in person.
Well I get home, and it looks like we might be able to work things out and maybe get back together in (I’m predicting) August. He says he still has feelings for me and “part of me wants to get back with you…” he says.
Well long, long long story short, he made a fool of himself, lied, got caught at one of his lies, and he pushed me out of his life. That charade ended June 24. So I go from thinking this man is my soulmate, my perfect half, to KNOWING hes a liar and a cheater. My heart is still coming to terms with this. The perfect girl he’s looking for…from what I hear, sounds like me…and it hurts still to find out what a truly bad person he is. We were very in tune with each other. Once we were sleeping next to each other and I experienced one of his nightmares, first hand. I woke up physically sick and screaming and running from the room. I not only knew his deepest, darkest secret, I saw it first hand. I could sense things unspoken things about him and he could read me like a book. Everyone said how wonderful we were together.
Its had me upset and offline. I’ve been spending time with a mutual friend of ours, who today told me that my ex is still into hardcore drugs like coke…even though he told me he was done with that life about 18 months ago. I really thought he was clean. I had absolutely no idea. I just found this out today, I’m still in shock. He’s bipolar and manic depressive. I’ve seen him sweet and Godly and heard him talk about Jesus and the power of prayer. I’ve seen him use his off days to help his parents fix up their house instead of spending time with me. I’ve seen a good man, and now I’ve seen one that isnt worth anything. It hurts.
Most of my life is still in boxes or lost in boxes, we have an enormously bad ant and spider problem at the new house, and things at home haven’t been happy and things in my social/love life haven’t been happy either. We moved 10 miles north of our old house, which puts me 18-20 miles, 30-45 minutes from my friends, and still about an hour from my best friend who lives even farther north than I do. So on my low days, I can’t pop over to anyone’s house anymore. It costs about $8 round trip to visit my friends that live South of me. Not so bad I guess, but it adds up fast. My cat had kittens…and those kittens had kittens…and there was about 9 baby kittens that we couldn’t take with us to the new house, as it was a lease and they didnt really allow pets. We snuck in our dog and 3 cats…two are stictly indoors and the third is outside. We couldn’t take care of 9 more kittens, so we literally called every no kill shelter and adoption place within maybe 30 miles. Every single one of them is full, so we had no choice but to take them to the SPCA. Lukily it is cat month there and they are sweet and cute babies, so I’m hoping they will all go to new and loving homes. I cried seeing all the adult cats in there that looked so sweet and just needed a “Forever Family”. That was really hard taking all those kittens away. One of the mamma cats we couldnt catch, she’s too wild. The third one, a friend took because she was an adult cat. I was teary eyed all day about it. My poor mother has a softer heart than I do, and was shaken up all day about it too.
I used to work at Dominos delivering Pizzas but with the gas prices going up, and the tips going down, I had to quit. Of the $1100/month I was making, $300 was going back in my car. I’m still working there a few days to have an income at all, and the other days Ive been job hunting and trying to get resumes and portfolios out. I’ve almost been back in the states a whole month and I still havent found a job. (and those sunrise laps! must…..have…haha)
Mom and I are taking a holiday to my Grandmother’s house out in the country, with 2 of my Aunts and 3 of my cousins to escape for a while.
I just wanted to let everyone know whats been going on and such in case someone tries to get a hold of me, or if anyone was curious. If by strange chance, its an emergency of some kind, contact GB, she has my cell phone number I think. I’ll be back, definatly. I still haven’t gotten to brag on my Spring Green SK(Orianna) and little spotted flap cat I obtained while I was over seas. What everyone says is true-the SKs are massively huge and heavy! I needed help getting her out of her box!I know it’ll get better…but things have been hard since I got back home. Lies or truth, I did have a couple good days all thanks to my (now) ex and his very different, and sweet and caring cousin, who took me to a Shinedown concert in downtown Houston.
But um, yea. That’s where Ive been…dealing with all that.
Aw, Wolfen, I’m so sorry things have gone so wrong. I hope you were at least able to anjoy your time here.
If it cheers you up any, I’m going to finally be able to go into Zürich next week and pick up those things you have on your wishlist. We can’t send the sausage or the peach beer, but you’ll be getting the stuff from Caché and Manor.
Hang in there, and congrats again on the SK. *hugs*I am so sorry about your ex boyfriend. That must hurt you so deeply. I Pray that everything will piece itself back together in due time. *hugs*
Sorry to hear things are going so badly, especially with the ex.
I hope life turns around for you soon.
Oh wow…what a rough time of things….we’re glad to have you back, but I’m really sorry about what you’re going through. 🙁
Ah! I’m so sorry, Wolfen.
Big hugs!
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http://www.sarahjestin.com/feedbacklists.htmIt’s always sad when you give of yourself to someone and think you’re getting it in return, then come to find out he or she is completely opposite of the person you thought you’d known for years. I’m sorry all of this is hitting you at once, Wolfen; it was very gutless of him to break up with you overseas. At least you found out, though, before you two became more serious. That’s a pretty name for your Secret Keeper; congratulations on winning her! We’re here for you when you need us. Come back to us soon! Good luck with the job search!
( I am not chewing on you guys that are genuinely great. just sympathizing with what she is dealing with)
why is it that the ones that see so great just HAVE to go and prove what an @ss they really are? that is just terrible, but obviously he is not worth it. I hope you get to feeling better soon at that your heart catches up with your head so that you do not have to linger in the upsetness of this stuation.
I am so sorry things are going so badly for you but at least you found out what he was really like before you married him and possibly had a child I believe that would have been worse for you. I do know it must have hurt to find out your idol had feet of clay
What a mess, hon. I am sorry this happened, but on the up side, at least you know the truth about your ex before you got married. Everything happens for a reason, and I am hoping that this means there is something better coming round the corner. Just hang in there.
You’re a beautiful and talented person, I have no doubts that it will be noticed when the time is right and you are ready to love again.
Good luck on the job hunting, something will come up soon, just gotta keep at it.
Meanwhile, enjoy your stay with your aunts and have a good time.
Kyrin
I am sorry to hear that about your ex. I also know that when people are on drugs they are not themselves and can do things they wouldn’t normally do. So it is really difficult to really know how they are or who they are. I do agree with Kyrin, everything happens for a reason and there will be more people that you meet in your lifetime. Live life to the fullest. 😀
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