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I’m not really good at all the sentimental stuff, but I’ll try my best.
We are with you Amber, in some way shape and form, all of us here are with you and feel your pain, and your joy at her memories. Some of us more than others, but we are there for you. Thank you for sending a part of yourself out, and sharing that with us. I REALLY REALLY wish I was there right now to give you a hug (no belly button raping, I promise)….I only hope that you can feel us back, giving our love and support. I’m sorry that Louis and I will miss you when we come up on Mon.
Sending you Warm Fuzzies all over!
Vantid, I understand fully what you are saying, although I also found this out too late. Growing up I only had one grandparent. My moms dad passes on when she was 6, and here mom about a month after I was born, my dads dad was killed by a drunk driver when I was 3, so all I had was my dads mom. She was always distant to me and my sister, things she did for our cousins she never did for us, I have never knowen why, no one knew why, or at least they never told me. There were never birthday cards or christmas card from her. I cant even remember her calling me, even when one of her bus tours stopped in town for a few hours. The last time I had seen her she didnt even know who I was, this was her 80th birthday, about 4 years ago. I had decided along time before that it didnt matter, if she wasnt going to accept me, then I would just stop talking to her and only seen her for my fathers sake. So when she did pass on in December of 2005, I never dreamed that her service would be so hard. Again I went for my father, I knew it would disappoint him if I didnt go so we drove the 9 hours to attend the service, and it was the hardest thing I have ever sat though in my life. Even typing this was hard I had to stop so many times to prevent me from crying(Im at work) it is never easy to loose someone close, even if you decide that you will be fine without them, I learned things about my grandma, never granny she hated that, at her funeral that I never had the chance to ask of her, because she never made herself seem open enough to talk about things like grandad and her past.
If you have grandparents find out all you can about them, and cherish the times you do get to spend with them, you will regret it if you dont.
Vantid I am very sorry for your loss, it will get easier as time goes by, I assure you, Tina.
Amber
I send all my thought’s and sympathies to you and your family. I lost my Omi last May. She was 92 and 1/2. I was with her about an hour before she passed, and she was having a party of somekind with my Opa, and various other family and friends that had already passed. I was fortunate that I could ask my Opa to make her transition an easy one. He passed in ’99 at the age of 91. I was supposed to go up and see him. Talked to him the day before, and said I would be there the next day. Then I got the call “that” morning. I am so grateful that I got the chance to say goodbye, and help her transition. Know that she will be watching over your shoulder, and even guiding your hands in your wonderful artwork.
Let the tears come as they will. Wear them as a rememberance, and a joy of who she is and was.
Louis
I am very sorry to hear about your loss also. My grandma died in 99. I found out through Email from my mother 3 days after the fact(Email was new to me then.) It was 8 days before I was supposed to return from Korea, so they would not have let me go to the funeral anyway, but it was very sad to know that even if I had been allowed to, I missed it. We used to write to eachother faithfully, and to this day, I still miss her spidery handwriting, and monthly letters. It will get better over time. Just remember the happy stuff and she will live on in you.
I’m very sorry for you loss, Vantid. I just lost a close friend a few weeks ago and it’s given me a resolve to keep people who matter close to me. I’ve developed a new relationship with my brother because of it. Sometimes good things come out of sad things. Hang in there.
I am also sorry to hear about your loss. My last grandmother (dad’s mom) passed away this year in January. I always told myself that I was going to go up there, but I never made it. I still feel guilty about it. I have been told that I am a lot like her, very caring and would do anything for people I know. My grandpa (her husband) passed away about 5-7 years ago. My great-grandfather (mom’s g-pa)passed away about 8 years ago, right before my 21st birthday. My grandma (mom’s mom) passed away about 4 years ago around christmas time). The last 2 were the hardest because I was a lot closer to them. I only have one grandfather left. I have been to many funerals and they don’t get easier. I sometimes think of what I could of done different, but then I come to the conclusion that it is better to think of the good times and not dwell on the shouldas. Things do happen for a reason, even tho we don’t understand it all the time. Spend the time getting to know your other family memebers. I hope you have a safe trip back.
I’m really happy for you that you got to go to the funeral. Of my 4 grand-parents, I’ve lost 3, and I haven’t been able to go to any of their funerals, as they all lived in France. Hearing my mom describe it afterwards helped a little – I’m all choked up thinking about it and it’s been a few years – but it’s just not the same.
Luv and hugs.
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http://www.sarahjestin.com/feedbacklists.htmddvm wrote:Vantid, I am so sorry about your grandmother. It is never easy to loose someone you love – and don’t be surprised if weeks from now it suddenly seems like it was just yesterday. Grief can be funny that way. My heart goes out to you and to your dad. It doesn’t matter how old we are – you never feel younger or less able to cope with things than when your mother dies. My prayers and good wishes for your family.
Well said. Having things come up even after years have past is part of the grieving process too.
Vantid, I would also like to offer my condolences as well. I lost my grandmother 2 years ago come May and my father last month so I want to offer my sympathy and understanding. I think it was a good thing that you vented here if it helps. Heck, just talking about everything just helps, especially when it’s big, like this. I’m glad you shared. I had many the same thoughts and feelings (about the funeral thing) that you had mentioned and it was nice to see I wasn’t the only person who felt that way. 😀
A part of your grandmother will always be with you and in time you will learn more about her from others. Make sure you keep those memories alive in art, paper, or words.
*multiple bear hugs and passes the tissue box* 🙂
Amber, it was beautiful of you to post all that about your grandmother… It was beautifully worded and it’s so clear that it came straight from the heart. I am disconcerted to find how different what you said is from what I remember about my grandparent’s death… there wasn’t any funeral or anything–but then some things are the same. And I was so much younger than you are.
It’s good you are able to post about your thoughts and feelings so openly, it will help a lot as you get over the grief. *hugs* It feels weird giving condolences that aren’t in person, hehe. Take care.
Thanks again guys. And thank you for sharing the stories of your own losses as well.
Got home the other day. Oi. It’s good to be back. I am still sad, and I worry about my PaPa, but he is strong. I think he will live on with the memories of his best friend in his heart, and while the hurt will never go away, for any of us, it will ease with time. I know it’s cliche, but it’s the truth.
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