- This topic has 39 replies, 1 voice, and was last updated 17 years ago by .
-
Posts
-
My dad just called me an hour ago and wanted to know if it was ok for them to come over. Of course I was breastfeeding so I couldn’t answer him so once I was done I called back. I got my mom and told her tonight wasn’t a good night. I told her Danny is sleeping right now since its his turn to pull the night shift and I don’t feel so hot. I asked if they could come over tomorrow. She told me they couldn’t they had to work on remodeling the house. When I said how about Sunday she told me the same deal. So now I can tell they are mad but oh well. I don’t think its too much to ask for someone to tell me ahead of time that they want to come over and if its ok with us. The only people I’ve had over was my brother who gave me 3 days notice that he was coming and my mom just showed up unannounced while he was over here anyway. Also if people are going to come over I would like some notice so I can clean up a bit. My parents make it a point to nit pick everything in my house (they do the same to my brother) and I don’t want to hear it. Since the baby was born we haven’t had a chance to really clean and I just know they would give me grief for it.
Nothing wrong in asking for advance notice! You can always say your doctor recommends limiting Alyssa’s exposure to the ‘outside world’ until she is a little older. You certainly don’t want her, or you or your hubby to get sick. If they chose to be offended that’s their problem. If they won’t compromise by coming a day or two later, also their problem. How likely is it they’ll just show up on your doorstep? (Don’t answer the door… 😈 )
twindragonsmum 😀
tdm
No it isn’t wrong for you to ask for advanced notice. It’s the polite thing for them to to do, especially for parents with a newborn.
This is part of the reason I’m SO glad I don’t live in the same town as my parents or In Laws. Since we live 6 hours from one and 12 from the others they have to call in advance to be sure it’s okay for a visit.
Good grief! You have too much family stress, as usual but especially at this time with a new baby. Stick to your guns. Heck, I despise when ppl come over unannounced or without much notice (with VERY FEW exceptions). It makes me uncomfortable in my own house and then I start to pick apart my own house even if they dont notice something isnt in the right place.
Do they have keys to your house? If not, sheesh, Id simply not answer the door. If you want to be extra polite (not that youre getting it), put a note on the door that says the family is down for much needed rest and isnt taking visitors of any kind at this time.
As for your mom, I dont like to say this but if she continues to do and say the wild things she does to you, I would seriously consider talking to a police officer, sit down with them and explain everything as much as you can. Try to keep calm. Your mom has come out with some violent thoughts, truth be told. So, in the future, a restraining order may not be so unrealistic considering your history here.
Good luck sweetie and just go and hybernate for a while with Danny and Alyssa, for that extra special family bonding time between parents and daughter. Lose yourself in it; use it as an escape from the rest of the world for now. It cant hurt.
I feel bad telling them no (bad for my dad not my mom). I know they want to see her but I’m just not up to visitors. I think she had my dad call in the first place because she knows I don’t like saying no to my dad but lately he has turned into her and acts just like her. My mom was all like “well I would just like to see her before she grows up” or something like that. I told her she looks exactly the same as the last time she saw her except she is a little more yellow.
My parents used to do that all the time. They live 3 hours away and they would call from the road to say they were coming over. Then there is the mad scramble to clean up… 🙄
But after a couple of times when we just said that we were going out, too bad, they now call a day or two ahead to make sure we don’t have plans. Unfortunately I guess you can’t do that with the new baby and your parents living so close. I think your mother is a little disrespectful (okay I think that she a pain in the a**) expecting you to work around her schedule when you’ve just had a baby. I would just tell her that you’re too tired, and don’t let her bully you into doing what she wants.
Another thing I just thought of is I have to pack up my airbrush when they come over. My dad bought it for me as a gift two years ago but my mom wants to use it so he keeps telling me to give it back. Since I was painting dragons before I had the baby I have it all set up at my kitchen table and I just know if they come over and see it they will try and take it. I’ve already told them time and time again it was a gift to me and they are not getting it back but they don’t listen. If they take my airbrush I will be pissed!
Oh god, if mom gets her hands on that airbrush, kiss it goodbye and consider it gone.
Hey, can you really airbrush inside? I recently met someone who teaches airbrush classes (he is incredible in all the work he does, very skilled and friendly too) but I realized if it had to be done outside, I could only do it in FL winter. Forget summer! I have a sun room with screen I could use it in if I out a card table in there. Or, I could make room in the garage and have our friends (who had the puppies) put in a ventilation & coolant system in there so I dont pass out from heat. Luckily Im not affected by acrylic- they dont smell to me.
You’ll still need to wear a mask, it’s not so much the fumes. It’s more the fact that with a spray that fine, you’ll be breathing in paint particles and that ain’t good.
I’m sure you can’t airbrush inside. When I use it I open up my french doors and turn on the fans. That and I use a mask. It’s the only way I can use it this time of year.
Absolutely not!
You are a new mother, adjusting to new baby’s schedule, you and Danny are just getting into a routine, people coming over whenever they want is too disrupting. Your Mom and Dad can either come over when it is convient for you, or not at all!
This isn’t about them, why can’t your Mom get that not everything is about her? Arrgghh….I want to strangle her for you!
Anyway, stand up for yourself, and tell her she needs to figure out a day next week that will work and let you know by Saturday which day she’d like to come over and when, and that the chosen day needs to be at least 2 days after Saturday. I’d also tell her that one word about the condition of your house and she is getting escorted to the door and asked to leave.
You guys don’t have time to clean and make the house pretty, right now you are lucky you have time to eat and sleep, housework is way at the bottom of the list, and she’d better not bitch at you about it, or by Gods I’m driving up there and kicking her butt!
Kyrin
Not to side track this thread (sorry PD), but as for airbrushing, regardless of where, Id always planned to wear a mask. That was never a question. But the sun room is all windows and if I open them all, they are screened in and so is the garage if I open it and slide the glass screening closed. Both rooms have ceiling fans in them, however, wouldnt any kind of breeze like that interfere with the directional blowing flow of the paint coming from the brush hits?
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
