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I’m glad to see folks reacting the way they are to this thread. My mom has taught fifth grade for a long time, and the stories she tells about parents failing to enforce basic rules with their kids would curl anyone’s hair. When a kid refuses to do their schoolwork, or acts disruptively in class (i.e. running around the room and shouting, if you can imagine), parental responses are generally very disappointing. She gets things like, “Well, my child says he didn’t do it, so you must be mistaken,” “My child would never do that,” and my favorite: “Well, my child feels uncomfortable and restricted in your classroom. You need to change the way you do things so that he won’t act like this.” (I nearly choked when she related the last one. 😯 👿 )
Yeah, she’s my mom and I’d defend her to the death. 🙂 But I honestly believe that she’s one of the best teachers in the district and gives her students a much better learning environment than most kids get to see. The majority of her students are wonderful kids and I’ve seen dozens of students come back years down the line and say hello and chat with her about what’s going on in their lives. It’s really sweet. But the one or two kids per year that are little monsters and have parents that let them run amok . . . well, Mom’s retiring this year, and she is really glad to be done! The trend has gotten a lot worse over the past five to eight years. 🙁
Ugh talking about bad parents I had to take Alyssa for her 4 month checkup today and had a run in with unruly children. I was sitting on the well baby side and this couple came in with two children. The one had a runny nose and was coughing all over the place. He was running around (on the sick kid and well baby side) with no shoes on. He kept coming over to me coughing and his dad was just following him around saying “no no stay over here” but he never did anything to keep him on the sick kid side. I had Alyssa on the floor in her car seat and this kid runs over and goes to lean on the car carrier. I was ready to throw him off when his dad snatched him up and walked away. No “I’m sorry” or “no son don’t do that” he just walked away. Since he didn’t tough Alyssa I didn’t say anything about it but when Danny came back to pick me up (he was getting his blood drawn across the street) he was pissed and wanted to go find them and yell at them. I just don’t understand why people feel they don’t need to discipline their children.
My sister taught kindergarten for a few years and quit to teach at a private school where she had more authority for disipline. She said she spent 3/4 of the day just trying to control bad behaved and unruly children with no manners.
**Caution** this has the potential to turn into a rant, and I will try–HARD– to not let that particular dog off it’s leash, but…….accept my apologies in advance…..
It seems that we as a race are going to “PC” (politically correct) ourselves into oblivion. We are far too concerned with what others are going to think about us if we do…”X”
What was considered discipline when a lot of us were younger, is now considered “child abuse” and chief among that would be the ability to control and/or discipline our kids. I’m sorry and will apologize in advance to those of you that don’t believe in spanking, etc., to each their own, but truthfully, most of the people I know that are in my age group were spanked/punished as kids, and I’m NOT talking–“time outs”–and none of us has gone on to become axe murderers yet. My cousin is a teacher in the high school level, and the things she tells me makes my skin crawl. I don’t know about y’all, but I can remember being completely HORRORFIED if a teacher raised their voice in general, let alone at ME, and the news of any misbehavior got home long before we got out of school for the day, with punishment not far behind. The teachers nowadays aren’t allowed to voice opinions, raise their voices, or do a multitude of any other things that might regain them the control of their classrooms. Same for the neighbors; if a neighbor reported bad behavior to our folks, you could be sure there would be punishment there, too. (And kudos to Danny and that neighbor for their handling of the cat incident, btw!)
I’m not advocating beating children into bruises and the hospital, but the thought of being spanked or grounded/punished certainly kept us from running as wild as kids do now. And I know I learned to not repeat the behaviors that earned me a spanking/grounding. God, I must be getting old…. 😛 My family had a rule of 3: you got off with a warning the first 2 times. If you were stupid enough to repeat the behavior and get caught a third time, you got spanked/punished in some way. It made sense to me. 😉
We were taught never to mouth off to an adult–ANY ADULT–and the thought of telling a teacher/parent/neighbor to go F themselves never even surfaced, let alone happen. 😯To allow your sick kid to run amok in a doctor’s office and potentially infect other people/kids is the epitome of rudeness and selfishness. It’s right up there with the folks that inflict their kids on other restaurant diners, and other harried mom’s in the supermarket. It’s bad enough to begin with that you have to bring the babies into the office where they are targets for any bug to begin with, but to compound that risk?
And don’t get me started on the kids that threaten to call family services on their parents when those parents attempt to regain control of their house; as far as I’m concerned that simply begs the response of “If You Don’t Like It Here, you are Welcomed to LEAVE and go live somewhere else“. Send a postcard. 😈
GRRRRRRR……I’ll shut up and return to lurkdom now…
You got 3 chances?! 😯 😆 I am only 21 and I got one chance and one chance only. It didn’t matter whether we even did it or not if the adult saw us do it that was that. My parents have softened a lot on my sister… we won’t go there or that will be a huge rant. She gets away with murder comparatively. I was grounded even if my room was too messy or I didn’t clean the litter box when I was told and rather did it later that night, if I said but Mom and tried to whine about it or talk my way out of it it was another week onto that one.
Too bad you don’t live closer to me tasgrs I think we have a lot in common and would make good friends!
tatt2dcowgrl wrote:You got 3 chances?! 😯 😆 I am only 21 and I got one chance and one chance only. It didn’t matter whether we even did it or not if the adult saw us do it that was that. My parents have softened a lot on my sister… we won’t go there or that will be a huge rant. She gets away with murder comparatively. I was grounded even if my room was too messy or I didn’t clean the litter box when I was told and rather did it later that night, if I said but Mom and tried to whine about it or talk my way out of it it was another week onto that one.
Too bad you don’t live closer to me tasgrs I think we have a lot in common and would make good friends!
I got 3 chances from my grandparents; my dad was a one shot deal. And ditto for the “But MOOOOOooom…..thing. Best way to add more time to the sentence. 😉 I will say this, though: my brother got the same treatment as far as our dad was concerned. As far I went, I hated being grounded more than anything. Sending me to my room didn’t faze me, but making me have to stay out in the living room with the rest of the family did. 😛 And if I was really bad, I would be grounded, not allowed to listen to my stereo, OR read a book. I have always not been a huge fan of tv, and would much rather prefer to read, paint, draw, write, etc. My dad could be *such* a barbarian. 😕 But his methods certainly worked in my case.
I agree; we do have similar backgrounds, and it would be great to have someone else to ride with. 😉 My friends would come over and my dad had a dark mustache and long dark black hair and didn’t smile very often unless he was in a really good mood and they’d be like ‘your dad is scary, is he mad at us?’ He seriously scared my friends just by sitting there! And then when he quit smoking when I was 12 or so he was a real bear!
It’s all soggy here and no shoes on the horses so we haven’t been doing much riding 🙁 But I get to go on my first real vacation in June! I’m going to South Dakota by Deadwood for a week to ride!
i remeber 1 time i called my mom a B*** when i was about 10 or so, and she slapped the taste right out of my mouth in front of all my friends. They scattered i got grounded and i didnt turn into a murderer or any kind of criminal . I think a spanking should be a manditory national holiday on a certain calendar day say the 5th of each month .. call it a reminder holiday to be good 😛
Hey, my birthday falls on a 5th! I’m changing my birthday if necron gets his way! 😆 Maybe I’ll just stop having them….
My dad was one of the surly silent kinds, too. My friends all had the same reaction, too. I just tried to avoid having friends over too often. I preferred their houses to ours whenever possible.
I don’t think I had any parties for birthday’s or sleep overs as a kid between the ages of 8 to 17. The one party I can remember being at our place was the year I graduated from HS; my dad had died the year before, and mom decided it was time to try to regain some sort of “normal” life. What ever THAT meant. 🙄How long does it take to get to Deadwood from WI?
I’m not sure, we’re pulling a horse trailer so we’ll have to stop to let horses out to walk. We’ll leave Friday afternoon and get there Saturday night probably. It’s supposed to take 12 hours but will probably end up taking us more like 15-16. We figure round trip it’s going to cost about a thousand dollars in diesel 😯
It’s my first ‘real’ vacation! Lol! We went camping as kids but never out of state or anything.
the worst punishment i ever got was sitting on the stairs. See our stairs faced the front door, so if we did somthing really bad my mom would open the front door while we sat there so we could see our friends playing. If we spoke to them we got another half hour there..that was a rough punishment
Barrdwing wrote:I’m glad to see folks reacting the way they are to this thread.
I suspect that those of us who do not think that spanking solves all or even any problems with children are keeping studiously quiet. Oh wait. Darn. Me and my big mouth.
Well, I think punishment should depend on the crime. Humiliating the child (usually without the need of spanking) works. If it doesn’t then spanking works too….
For instance, child screams in a restaurants. If I were the parent, I would apologize quietly… with my child (esp. if young enough) slung over my shoulder in a most humiliating way as I walked out. Same with a grocery store. Makes everyone but the kid happy. Of course the kid may also get grounded depending on whether he/she shuts up quickly or not…
Or similarly humiliate them in front of their friends. The teasing the next day will surely get them to behave…. 😈
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