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I am very sad, but very happy because my mom has finally found her old love, and they have gotten married-the problem is that she will be moving with him to Florida on Saturday. I am very close to my mom, and besides my husband-she is the only person that I love to talk to and see on a regular basis. I do love and talk to my sisters and my grandma, etc. but it is not the same as my mom. I have not cried yet, but I have noticed a big change in my behavior. I will come up with any excuse to come over to her house to see her and to talk. She likes it (considering she will move soon)and isn’t feeling crowded or anything with me coming over. I live in Iowa-so that is FAR.
My question is-can anyone give me ideas and advice for coping with missing her, and/or cheap airlines to go see her sometime in a few months?
We have a farewell party for her on Saturday-and I have a feeling that there will be a lot of crying going on there. 🙁It’s so nice to hear that someone doesn’t want their parents to move away! How blessed your mom is to have you! Will she have internet because that would be one medium you could use in keeping in touch with her and cheaper too! Nothing like a heart filled email! Also, there are some deals out with phone companies that you can call anywhere in the US for one low monthly fee. Now travel–can’t help there because I don’t travel much but I’m sure some well planned visits would be most welcome. Also, does she know how you really feel? I’d let her know! Tell her how much she means to you and how you’ll sorely miss her.
Remember this is really not goodbye because she is as near as your own heart. She will be happy in her new life–rejoyce in that and maybe when you start thinking of her being so happy, you will not be so unhappy she is physically far away. 🙂
Only managed to be far away for a few months, then Grandpa had a heart attack, I moved back to be with him (we were close), end of story for me. 🙁
Do you live near a second tier airport, and will she? (there are several in Florida) Smaller airlines like Allegiant fly only between them, and can be quite cheap. Also, since checked bags are expensive anymore, you can mail a box of clothes etc. ahead, postage may well be cheaper than the bag fee. Or travel light, with only a small carryon, and do laundry while you’re there.I’d suggest getting her a web cam if she doesn’t have one! Buy one for her (and one for you if you don’t have one) and set it up on her computer and teach her how to use it.
My family is ridiculously close (eating dinner together couple times a week and doing family outings/vacations even though we are all adults) and when my father went over seas on combat duty we got him a webcam. Even though he couldn’t be here for important events like my nephew’s arrival, being able to see him on the cam afterwards was a way to make him feel inclusive.
Hopefully your mother’s open to the idea. We tried this for my grandmother who lives a thousand miles away, but she’s been to stubborn to learn the technology. It’s a shame as I think she would have enjoyed seeing us but we ended up getting her a cell phone on one of our plans so she can call and talk for free anytime. 🙂
A webcam is a great idea. Especially if you both have something like Skype.
My husband, his brother and I have a tabletop roleplaying game that we play via Skype as our GM lives in Virgina.
Amber and I use Tokbox a lot to have webcam chats. That might be easier for someone that is not real computer savvy.
http://www.tokbox.comVolunteer mod- I'm here to help! Email me for the best response: nambroth at gmail.com
My art: featherdust.comJennifer wrote:Amber and I use Tokbox a lot to have webcam chats. That might be easier for someone that is not real computer savvy.
http://www.tokbox.comXD XD Yes-she is not computer savvy at all! haha
Mom will get two things in her life that she has never had before-a cell phone with *gasp* texting (she recieved that one a few days ago)and a computer with internet access! She is practicing on the texting and it is so humorous to watch her spend about 10 minutes to type a two line text. lol
She will have computer access once she is in Florida-so I will get to see if she will be one of those people who emails often or rarely. I will ask her about the web cam idea! She would love to see us and her grand babies!LadyFirebird-you know, I hadn’t really thought about whether or not she knows how I feel, but fortunately my answer is yes. 🙂 I told her a few times how I really want her to stay close-but it is more important for her to start her new life in Florida! She has always had HORRIBLE men who have always taken advantage of her, and she finally has (what seems) to be the right man for her and I am thrilled. I have always wanted her to live somewhere besides Iowa because she HATE HATES HATES the cold. I honestly do think that she knows how I feel-but I believe that I will spend at least one moment where I will doubly check on that. 🙂
Pipsxlch-I would have never have thought about mailing clothes due to the fact that it might be cheaper than the bag fee. Cool! 8)
I am praying that we can go to Florida to see her soon.Just a fun little story: When I was maybe about 10 years old, I got in trouble for *something*, and mom was going to spank me. She seemed extra mad at the moment, so I decided that I wasn’t going to get spanked. I ran to the dining room table with mom chasing me and I did that dodge/ring around the rosy thing with her for a moment, and then I ran into me and my sister’s room with a bunk bed. Now-at this point mom was getting more and more angry, but I remembered that she would tell us girls that we couldn’t be up on the top bunk at the same time (there were three of us) because the bed would fall through. I was a smart girl, so I was thinking, “Well-if all three of us can’t get on the top bunk at once–then mom will not get on the top bunk to get me because she is heavier than all three of us!” So, I scrambled up to the top bunk, scrunched myself in the farthest corner that I could, and I was expecting that mom would not climb up there. To my shock (and horror) mom was climbing up the steps to the bunk! I thought I’d remind her, “No mom! You’re too heavy-the bed will fall through!” Oh man! She was roaring her way to me! She was going to REALLY get me now! She reached the middle of the bed….*THWUMP!* Oh my gosh-we were on the bottom of the bunk bed! That was fun! (I secretly wanted to do it again!) All of a sudden dad ran to the bedroom, and they frantically made sure that no one was under the bed when it fell. Everything was clear-and even what I did was forgotten. *whew!*
Mom and I will still talk about that story (and more) and we laugh about them now! 😛 XD
Our family is spread out all over the world – It was hardest when our parents were in Scotland, one bro and family in Australia, one sis and family in Massachusetts, one bro and family in Chicago, one bro and family in So California, one sis and family in No Cali and us in Idaho… the internet was our lifeline and a good long distance phone plan! We’re not quite as spread out now as we used to be; at least we’re all stateside – but it does take a little getting used to! Yay for your mum! and huggles for you! it’ll all work out how it’s supposed to. I’m always talking to someone in my family everyday. It just becomes a new routine 😀
twindragonsmum 😀
tdm
Loved your story about avoiding the spanking! I’m sure it was telling her she was ‘too heavy” is what got her. If that bed didn’t fall, your behind would be so sore, you wouldn’t been able to sit for a week! 😆 Funny how what made her so mad so many years ago now brings laughter! These are the stories that brings back so many wonderful memories–I’m sure she appreciates them now! 😀
She leaves tomorrow. 🙁 It is stating to hit me a little more-I am afraid that I will miss her too much. 🙁
I cried for a couple of days when I moved to NC, away from my whole family. But thankfully, my mom missded me too, so she comes up every few months to visit. The first few times I cried when she left, but it did get easier over time. But we chat alot on the phone so that helps.
Keeper of the Fledgings
azurielle wrote:I cried for a couple of days when I moved to NC, away from my whole family. But thankfully, my mom missded me too, so she comes up every few months to visit. The first few times I cried when she left, but it did get easier over time. But we chat alot on the phone so that helps.
She is talking about coming up in the Spring. I thought I would cry more-but I held it all in. Even on the way home I only shed a couple of tears. I can tell that even though I held it in, it is in my trying to get out. I guess I don’t like to cry. It is so emotionally draining right now, and I feel so tired and weary. She already left today–I hope Grandma doesn’t cry when we go out to lunch tomorrow, or I will cry too. 🙁
I know about that initial separation anxiety that happens when someone you care about goes away. It’s the hardest to get over but with time it does get better. A good cry and then some rest would do you some good. Taking your grandfather to lunch tomorrow is the best thing–at least you aren’t completely alone. 🙁
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