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I know I haven’t been on here much lately.. real life things just asked too much of me for me to concentrate on here.. but now I’m turning to this amazing community for some support… My boyfriend of the past 2 and a half years, and honest to god, love of my life just broke up with me… things to do with those real life things that kept me from here, to a degree… part of my own idiocy to not get over petty fears and build *our* life and support him as much as he has supported me… he felt that he can’t depend on me 🙁 I wish I could get him to understand how big of an eye opener I have gotten and how much that it has changed me (My old fears are nothing, perspective has brought me around to realizing I could have handled those things and I needed to months ago! instead of letting insecurities win over me… and ultimately, lose him..) I don’t know what to expect from time, but a the support here before has been so much help when I had things go south on me before… I’m in shock, I’m completely heart broken and I’m slowly realizing how much of my life is gone now.. how much of myself is gone now… our motorcycle rides, my dance partner, the person who loves every single movie I do even though most of our friends make fun of us, the man who shared a more old-fashioned lifestyle with me, the lil quirks I adored beyond belief, his absolute dislike for sour cream, his love of whiskey and his fantastic craft beer, that smile that made me fall in love with him all over again, and again, and again… he was (is) my Superman, my Sinatra, my family… he was everything I could have ever hoped for in a man, a true dream come true… the life we wanted, the life we had, perfection in an imperfect world… I complained about some of those things, but oh my god I loved them all, because they were the building blocks of forever… I had no idea our relationship was at risk, I never thought it was possible… I always thought we were strong enough to get through anything and everything thrown at us, I truly believed that… and to find out it’s because I was afraid to get a stupid day job (lonnnng story) and afraid of failure, that lead to this… that I didn’t do everything I said I would, because of fear… and in the end, made him feel like he can’t depend on what I say, because he expects more excuses… all I can do right now is get over all of that and do what needed to be done months ago.. drive off my own insecurities and get back to true me…
Now.. time is all that knows what is in store… but my lord my heart won’t be able to handle this smoothly… and I don’t know how to handle knowing he is “the one”… but I may have lost that forever… because of stupid little things that became big things and I let it become that… – I’m in so much shock, I’ve barely cried… it seems so unreal, I don’t feel like this is something that could happen, not us, not him…
Oh, Kaytana, I’m so sorry. I know there’s really nothing I can do or say, but hugs to you! I’ll hope things work out for you.
Oh no, I am so sorry Kaytana. That is definitely a really hard thing to deal with. I don’t know him so all I can say is if he sees how wonderful you are regardless of the little things that lead to this, maybe you just need time apart for him to realize that was a stupid mistake to let you go. If he can’t see beyond something like a little fear and insecurity which we all have then perhaps there is a guy out there who will understand and appreciate you more and love you no matter what you are going through. Maybe there are just some things you will get stronger with by having time to yourself for a little while and then once everything blows over, maybe much better things are in store for you! No one knows what the future holds and I know how painful it can be to be going through this right now as it has happened to me but maybe there is a lesson here to help both of you grow to become better people for the future. In the meantime try to stay positive about your life and who you are and what you have to offer and you will attract the same positive energy back into your life when it’s time.
Looking for rainbow or pink & teal grab bags!
I am so sorry Kaytana. Lifes paths are never easy. I agree with Kim and can only say that hopefully he will realize that he misses you as much as you miss him. It is to bad that he didn’t let you know long ago how much things were affecting him. Or if he did, that he wasn’t able to convey just how much so that you could fully understand how affected he was. I hope that you two can find your way back to each other and that together you will be able to move forward.
I wish you all the best luck.
HugssssLooking for:
"COSMIC SHIFT DRAGONS and KI-RINS" and the "OCTOPUS TANUKI TEST PAINT #1"I’m so sorry to hear this. I too have fears and insecurities that have (are) causing problems with my husband as well. I can empathize and totally understand how you are feeling about not being able to overcome it. Just know that you aren’t alone, and we are here anytime you need to get things off your chest or just a shoulder to rest on. Sometimes it is hard for people to know what to say, but we are all feeling for you and only wish happiness and content for you.
Love baby kirins, safari poads, mini keepers, and anything BLUE, BLUE, and, oh yes, BLUE.
I am so sorry, Kaytana. My only suggestion would be to tell him (if you haven’t acknowledged already) exactly what you have told us, probably best in written format. That way at least he has all information needed to perhaps have a change of heart. If not, at least you know you did what you could. Good luck.
Big hugs, sweets. I’m so sorry you’re going through such a hard time, but I hope you can at least get some positive change out of it. If his reasons for ending the relationship are valid (and think long and hard on that. Sometimes we rush to agree with everything someone says when we’re afraid to lose them) you can work towards overcoming those problems. It doesn’t mean that he’ll instantly come running back, but people are usually more receptive when they see real change. I get the anxiety thing, I really do. I hope you can overcome it. Therapy and supplements have helped me a lot. You might want to look into Happy Camper Natural Balance. It’s a mood stabilizing supplement blend. I’ve been taking it for a few months and it’s the first product like that where I have actually seen a result. It’s pretty inexpensive and you can get it on Amazon. It also doesn’t make me drowsy at all, just more calm. I like that. Again, big hugs. Feel free to vent all you need. You’ve got lots of friends who care about you!
Seeking Test Paints & GBs ! Please get in touch if you'd trade/sell. I'll remove pieces from list by owner request
ANY Red Eyed Unis
ANY Test Paint Bat
UNIS:
The Purple/Yellow Baby Uni of Awesome
Male- Snow Leopard TP
White Lighting Male, Pony, Colt and Grand - I have Mom, Baby, & Young
Ponycorns: Golden Zebra and/or Spotted Skunk
Mother: Okapi
Gothic - Mahogany
PEGS: Male Midnight Calico, Male Bloodstone, Mother Starlight Rain
DRAGONS: Male Coyotesorry to hear this happened to you Kay….*hugs*
4 things I'm looking for:
1. Mother Meerkat
2. production color Sitting Young Oriental dragons to be made in more colors besides VF, Brimstone would be awesome!
3. Female Griffin – Siamese with White
4. September Raffle Prize 2022 AHD Male GriffinSo sorry to hear. That is horrible news, I don’t know what advice to give but I hope you’re ok!! 🙁 *hugs*
So sorry to hear this news. 🙁 I think you’ve come to the right place for some support. I totally agree with what Aggie posted. Take care.
If his reasons for ending the relationship are valid (and think long and hard on that. Sometimes we rush to agree with everything someone says when we’re afraid to lose them) you can work towards overcoming those problems.
This ! These are indeed words of wisdom. I tend to think that if someone truly loves a person, and they are in a relationship together, then they work together to keep the relationship healthy and strong. This means talking to each other if something about the other person bothers them, keeping things civil at the same time, and try to work towards a solution. Just out-right breaking up with you, without even sitting down to discuss the things that were bothering him doesnt seem fair. (Unless communication wasnt easy in your relationship?)
Anywho, the details are none of my business. Just remember, not everything has to be YOUR fault. It takes 2 to work together to make a relationship work, and one person walking away without trying to work things out just doesn’t seem fair.
Being broken-hearted has to be the worst feeling in the world 🙁 So Im so very sorry you have to go through this 🙁 Just try to stay strong, and dont ever think you deserved this.. cause you didnt. *hugs*
Oh Kaytana, I feel badly for your situation, as everyone else has voiced.
It hurts. I know. Please don’t let the hurt overwhelm you. Seek out close friends and family who will quietly listen and support you now, which is important. You don’t need anyone to ‘fix’ your problem yet, you need time to grieve a bit first and get perspective back as you talk it out without judgments.
When you feel the time is right, then you can start to heal and perhaps reach out again. Don’t rush. Take your time and surround yourself with happy, beautiful reminders and thoughts, and helpful family and friends.
Good Luck.IN SEARCH OF MY NEXT GRAILS:
Black Peacock & Butternut Adult Poads
Kickstarter 'Rainbow Tiger' Bantam Dragon*~*~*~* Ela_Hara: The DragonKeeper *~*~*~*
*** Come visit me on deviantArt at http://ela-hara.deviantart.comThank you everyone for your kind words and support! I’ve been reading them all, but have been doing so from my phone (where I’m writing this from).. I will properly respond to each soon, I’ve just found it harder than I thought to talk about…
I’m moving my stuff out tomorrow (today), I’m going to have such a hard time with that… 2.5years of /our/ life needs to be split between who owns what 🙁 and it makes it so much more final…
So yeah, I am reading, and it all helps! I’m just needing some time…
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